The Cougar: Entering the Cougar’s den

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April 20, 2009

6:36 PM

Ladies and gentlemen, presenting what is possibly the greatest reality TV dating show since the second season of “Flavor of Love,” it’s… “The Cougar”!

That’s right, finally an older women who enjoys younger men is getting her 15 minutes (inexplicably, on TV Land). Her name is Stacey — but don’t bother remembering that, as everyone, including host Vivica A. Fox and the various nubile young men who have come to seduce her, refer to her simply as the Cougar.

The Cougar is a 40-year-old divorcee and mother of four. The short background shots of her family indicate she has children closer to twenty than tweens. Is it weird that she likes guys only a few years older than her own children?

Who cares? Let the circus begin!

The premiere (the series is eight episodes long) was classic dating reality show: 20 guys show up, and five have to leave after a party where they engage in a primal display of masculine sexual competition.

Of course, they each got to make a first impression, and the Cougar picked her favorite to be immune from elimination. I’ll give you three guesses which she picked.

That’s right! The youngest one! He impressed her because he just recently turned 21, so they shared one of his first legal drinks!

[insert shudder here]

The usual dating reality show antics take place: the boys argue about whether age matters, the Cougar talks about how younger men have a zest for life she finds irresistible, one of the guys draws attention to himself by going for a swim while the paunchier men stand around looking awkward. You know, the usual.

But did you know “The Cougar” is educational too? Check it:

*Guy*: “How would you like to try an Australian kiss?
*The Cougar*: What’s that?
*Guy*: Kind of like a French kiss, but down under.

Smooth move! Can’t wait to try that one at the Leafe! Actually, that guy was one of the five the Cougar kicked off the show. But don’t worry, I’m sure more gross stuff is coming soon.

_P.S. Leave your best cougar metaphors (Best from the show: “I really hope this cougar likes lamb, cause I’m nice and sweet and tender.”) in the comment section below. The winner gets a shout-out in the next ‘Cougar’ blog post!_

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