Stranger than friction

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October 10, 2009

10:35 AM

_Warning: The content of The Flat Hat’s Daily Grind blog contains adult themes and explicit language. Please contact the editor-in-chief if you have questions or concerns._

Have you heard? It’s that time of year again. Midterms! I feel like all my friends are studying for a huge test, writing a thousand papers at once or taking a nap before getting back to work. How unfortunate. Let’s all just take a break from poring over our notes and think about something fun — namely, sex. What could be more fun than that?

When we think about sex, I feel like we often think only about penetration. For ladies, it’s the good old P-in-the-va-G. For dudes, it’s P-in-the-patooty. Of course, there are plenty of other forms of penetration that are just as popular and enjoyable: oral penetration, penetration with strap-ons, etc. And when we think of sex acts that don’t involve a penis (or finger, or tongue, or dildo) going into some hole, we relegate them to the realm of “foreplay.” What’s with this? Why do we put penetration on such a pedestal? Ever heard of the wonderful world of frottage? You haven’t? Then read on.

If we take a quick trip down Wikipedia Lane and search “frottage,” we find a whole slew of information on non-penetrative sex. See how great this looks? Basically, frottage means friction: rubbing body parts together to generate sexual pleasure. Think of Boy Scouts trying to start a fire in the woods. How do they do it? They rub some sticks together!

(I apologize now for any Boy Scouts or former Boy Scouts I may have offended in the above paragraph. He will be on the lookout from now on for his own childhood fantasies working their way into blog posts where they don’t belong.)

But seriously. Think of all the fun you can have with this stuff. What a great way to get to know your partner’s body, without all the icky mess of actually having sex with him or her. There’s hand jobs, lap dances, docking, heavy petting — the list just keep growing!

Frottage is like foreplay that never ends — and don’t we all enjoy a great round of foreplay? Sometimes, the actual feat of penetration may not be that great. I’m sure you’ve all experienced some sexytimes that weren’t as hot as they could’ve been. And why? Because penetration can be complicated and (excuse the pun) hard. There’s lots of stuff to think about, whether you’re the one going in or the one getting gone in on: condoms, correct amount of lubricant, the initial entry, various angles, speed and direction of thrusting. I mean, don’t get me wrong. Anal penetration can be fantastic — and I’m told vaginal sex is often nothing to sneeze at either. Penetration, when done right, rocks. But what about those days and nights when it’s just not in the stars? Well, let’s take the pressure off! Next time you’re in it to win it, opt out of penetration. Try a heated session of frottage instead.

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