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Student veteran speaks of war

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__Neil Riley ’08, who served in Iraq and Afghanistan before coming to the College, talks about his experience in two wars__

p. Twenty-first birthdays are often celebrated at a bar, not under a tent in a war-torn country.

p. Neil Riley ’08, a student-veteran at the College, chuckled as he explained that for his 21st birthday, he wasn’t allowed to drink, as he was a soldier in the United States Army on duty in Afghanistan.

p. Hoping to make up for the inauspicious circumstances, Riley’s mother mailed him a unique birthday present. Describing it as a “super rum cake,” Riley confessed that it was filled with more rum than cake. “It tasted bad, but we were like, ‘Oh my god.’”

p. In October 2000, Riley signed up with his local recruiter after graduating from high school, deciding with his family that the army would help him pay for college and find motivation. He did not consider joining the army until his senior year of high school.

p. “All my friends went off to college,” he said. “I did this by myself.”

p. Riley entered the service Jan. 7, 2001, in Fort Benning, Ga.

p. He served in basic training for nine weeks, and he was allotted a single, three-minute phone call for the duration.

p. Following graduation from boot camp, Riley was allowed to see his family for six hours, after which he boarded a bus to Advanced Individual Training, where he remained until late June.

p. “I mean, it sucks, but you have to go through it,” he said. “I tell everyone that my drill sergeants saved my life in Afghanistan and Iraq because of the training, and that’s a fact.”

p. Riley reported for active duty in Fort Bragg, N.C., two weeks before the terrorist attack on Sept. 11.

p. “I remember because I was under a truck, and I had to change something, and I was frustrated because I didn’t know what I was doing,” he said. “Out of nowhere, the major of the battalion came sprinting down and screamed, ‘Get the fuck out of the motor pool right now. Move.’ We were going to lock up our stuff but he said there was no time for that.

p. “After we ran back to the company, they took everyone’s cell phone and said that we couldn’t make any calls. We all went over to the TV and, by this point, we knew that both towers had fallen and not by accident. And then, within a split second, it hit me. I was going to be called into action.”

p. Riley departed for Afghanistan in October of the following year. Positioned at Bagram Airbase, 27 miles north of Kabul, Riley and his unit were ordered to maintain the communications system in and around the base.

p. “I tell everyone that Afghanistan is one of the most scenic countries you could ever see,” he said. “Stepping off the plane into this open valley, it was mid-fall and in the distance were snow-capped mountains. It was beautiful.”

p. Some of his fondest memories are of his relationship with the Afghani community. “I loved the Afghani locals, they were the nicest people,” he said. Though most of the locals only spoke broken English, Riley would frequently speak to them through a translator.
p. His multi-cultural experiences were not limited to Afghanis, as he worked with English, French, Polish and Italian soldiers.

p. “I saw Afghanistan as this amazing achievement,” he said. “The entire international community coming together and getting the job done. And the Afghani people were very appreciative.”

p. Times were not always so encouraging, however. The night of his arrival to the base, a machine gun battle took place on the perimeter. The base was under the first of many mortar attacks, which occurred up to 20 times a day.

p. “Afghanistan was rough,” he said. “We slept in a 10-man tent the entire time we were there. The tent was put up on wooden stilts, and I didn’t realize why until February. February was the rainy season and the whole valley flooded. Even our little communications shack had to be raised off the ground because we were standing in a foot of water.”

p. With his life constantly at risk, the strain of war was unbearable at times. “How can you live under that kind of pressure for nine months straight? For 24/7 you are constantly on edge. Everyone is on edge. I mean, you’re supposed to be on edge, but to do it for that long, you know? It takes a toll on you, it really does.”

p. Living in a state of borderline insomnia, Riley estimated that he received no more than two to three hours of sleep per night. “You can’t sleep because you are always thinking, ‘Did I clean my weapon? Are my soldiers okay?’”

p. Although Riley was scheduled to leave in March, army officials ordered the soldiers to remain for an extra three months due to the invasion of Iraq.

p. Riley finally returned to the states in June 2003.

p. He said it was difficult to fall asleep in his bed at home.

p. “Every night in Afghanistan, I slept with my weapon. I had it with me at all times, and at night I kept it in my sleeping bag. So in the middle of the night, I woke up and felt around for my gun, and when it wasn’t there, I began freaking out. Then finally I realized, ‘I’m in America, I don’t need my gun anymore.’”

p. Most would consider someone who couldn’t sleep without his gun deranged. But Riley is anything but deranged; he is like any other ordinary student. Originally from Ashburn, Va., Riley is a graduate of Bishop O’Connell High School. He is the resident assistant of Unit J, and the cinderblock walls of his room at school are no longer visible, entirely covered by flags and posters of Arsenal, one of England’s top soccer clubs.

p. “Neil has seen a lot more of the world than many undergraduates,” said William Rennegal, Riley’s Intelligence and Public Policy professor. “In class, he is very focused. He often raises points of clarification, which is fun because it keeps me on my toes.”

p. Before arriving at the College, Riley took online classes while in the army. He said that studying was one of the few things that could keep his mind off the horrors of war. He completed his application to the College while fighting in Iraq.

p. Riley returned to active duty at Fort Bragg in June 2003. Though he was scheduled to complete his duty and leave the army in November 2004, he was informed three months in advance that he would be deployed to Iraq.

p. For Riley, the difference between Iraq and Afghanistan was the added responsibility of being promoted to a sergeant. He explained that in Iraq, “There was much more pressure having people under me always relying on me to tell them what to do. They rely on you constantly and it was a lot of pressure.”

p. On a daily basis, Riley was in command of four men and had 16 people to supervise within the squad. His primary concern was for two soldiers under his command who were both married and had several children at home.

p. “I always thought, ‘If I don’t get these guys back home in one piece, I’ll fail.’ To me, that would be failure. Whereas some guys were like, ‘We need to kill terrorists,’ I just cared about getting my guys back home safely and in one piece.”

p. The constant, agonizing stress he faced as a sergeant in Iraq was exhausting. He explained that he could not reveal any signs of fear or weakness to his soldiers.

p. “Whatever I made them do, I would do double. If I ordered them to carry a 40-pound ruck, then I would carry one that’s 80 pounds,” he said. “I look back now and realize that I was only 23 at the time. I was way too young for what I was doing, for the amount of responsibility I had.”

p. Besides his anxiety caused by greater responsibility, Riley remembered the increased political awareness of the soldiers in Iraq.

p. Riley told a story of a soldier in his unit who had a “freak out” during a meal in the cafeteria. The TV was turned on and then-Defense Secretary Donald Rumsfeld was reporting on the success of the occupation in Iraq.

p. “We were in the middle of talking about how it was total bullshit, when one of the my soldiers got violently upset and threw his tray in the cafeteria and screamed, ‘What the fuck are we doing here?’”
No matter what their rank, Riley noted that most soldiers talked about politics incessantly.

p. “In Afghanistan, we felt like we were doing good everyday, but in Iraq it was survival. You were just there to survive, do your time, and then get the hell out. Maybe that wasn’t the best mentality, but that’s how we survived.”

p. He explained that his time in Iraq led to his newfound interest in politics.

p. “Even coming back from Afghanistan, I didn’t care about politics. But when you start to see it affect the people around you and affect your life to the point where you can’t do what you want to anymore — they took a year of my life. That’s when I really got involved and started reading a lot of books and following the news.

p. And I thought that maybe this Iraq War wasn’t such a great idea.”

p. In November 2005, Riley and his unit were told they were going home, almost exactly a year from the day they arrived in Iraq.

p. The men had heard of several instances where soldiers had served their time and were being sent home, but just before departure were ordered to stay longer in Iraq. Consequently, there was dead silence in the plane while it remained on the ground in Kuwait waiting to take them home.

p. “When we took off, there was the biggest cheer in the world,” Riley said. “Everyone was celebrating, going ballistic. That was my entire unit. We left together and we came back together.”

Gateway program grows

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__166 students now receive full tuition from program__

p. Supporters are touting the College’s Gateway William and Mary program, a debt-free financial aid program instituted two years ago, as President Gene Nichol’s greatest accomplishment in the midst of recent controversy.

p. Gateway William and Mary replaces student loans with a combination of state and federal grants, in conjunction with the College’s pledge to meet all financial aid needs of undergraduate in-state students.

p. “Students from low-income backgrounds are sometimes deterred from pursuing higher education for fear of running up debt with loans,” Earl T. Granger, III, associate provost for enrollment, said. “The Gateway initiative provides the critical resources needed to pursue a college education.”

p. Other comparable institutions, such as the University of Virginia and University of North Carolina at Chapel Hill, have similar programs. Gateway William and Mary is considered one of Nichol’s greatest contributions to the College during his presidency, both by the College administration and Nichol support organizations such as WM Fights Back.

p. “The Gateway initiative has definitely been one of President Nichol’s hallmarks, thus far,” Granger said. “It was certainly a priority when he arrived in July 2005, and issues of access and opportunity have been issues that he was passionate about even prior to taking on his presidency here.”

p. According to the College administration, the Gateway program was developed by Nichol in the spring of 2005, before his presidential term began.

p. “Even before [Nichol assumed the presidency,] he challenged a number of us with what we could do in this area [of insufficient financial aid packages.] This was an area of big concern for him, and we worked with him before his arrival so it [could be announced] at the beginning of his presidency. None of it would have been possible without Nichol’s energy and passion,” Provost Geoffrey Feiss said.

p. In an opinion piece in the Oct. 28, 2007, issue of The Washington Post, Nichol wrote that, “the stark under-representation of low-income students in our most accomplished public universities has many and complex causes.
p. Insufficient state and institutional financial assistance, elevated tuition levels, K-12 preparatory challenges in some communities, diminished academic expectations in others, an abundance of well-qualified and well-resourced students from Northern Virginia — the list is long.”

p. For the class of 2011, 100 Gateway students were accepted, bringing the program’s total participants to 166. This is an 18 percent increase from last fall, according to Edward Irish, director of the Financial Aid Office.

p. “We are very pleased with the increased number of [Gateway students] this year; the increase is the most important part,” Feiss said. “We’re ahead of where we thought we would be in terms of how quickly we could get the word out.”

p. Students whose family income does not exceed $40,000 per year — double the national poverty level — are qualified for this financial aid program.

p. “Honestly, without the Gateway program, I don’t think I would have been able to go to college at all. I made good grades throughout high school, but my family wasn’t well off at all. The
p. Gateway program essentially saved me from being another bright kid with no resources,” Lamar Shambley ’10, a Gateway recipient, said.

p. Feiss stated that Gateway students are “indistinguishable” from all other students on campus in terms of success at the College. He predicts that 120 students will be accommodated by Gateway

p. William and Mary in the incoming class of 2012.

p. The College will be investing over $4 million annually to fund Gateway William and Mary when the administration has achieved their “desired target,” according to Granger. This target is projected at 600 students every school year, with around 150 from each class. Feiss believes the College will reach this target by 2010 or 2012.

p. This year the college spent approximately $900,000 to fund the Gateway initiative, according to Granger.

p. “In addition to aggressively seeking private funding, we are also actively exploring grants and other means to help fund this initiative. This is a top priority for all of us. Through partnerships and actively ensuring institutional visibility, we remain optimistic that we will experience steady growth,” Granger said.

p. Gateway William and Mary is a rare opportunity for lower-income students because loans have become such a prevalent form of financial aid.

p. “I saw on my financial aid [form] that I had [received] a substantial grant,” Shambley said. “At first I couldn’t believe it because all four of the other colleges I applied to wanted me to take out about $26,000 [per year] in loans, leaving me over $100,000 in debt after four years … I’m the first person to go to college in my family so I just took everything one day at a time and hoped for the best.”

p. Both supporters and critics of Nichol agree that the program is a beneficial one, but it is contested whether the idea was Nichol’s own.

p. Should Nichol Be Renewed, the anti-Nichol organization run by Jim Jones ’82, believes that the idea originated during President Tim Sullivan’s term and that Nichol’s role was in implementing the program.

p. “Should Nichol Be Renewed is in favor of the Gateway program, as long as we can afford it. It’s a good idea, but it needs a reliable funding source,” Jones said.

p. The lack of a reliable funding source is, according to Jones, why Sullivan was unable to put the idea into motion.

p. Jones believes that Sullivan came up with the idea. The reason Sullivan didn’t enact the program was that a steady source of funding could not be found. The program was set aside for the time being.

p. All sides do agree that if Sullivan discussed the program, it was in vague terms.

p. “The Gateway Initiative is a Nichol-branded initiative. Having said that, I cannot imagine that during Sullivan’s tenure as president that this kind of initiative was not discussed, given that other institutions … had already launched their [similar] programs,” Granger said. “I do think it is important to highlight that this initiative is broad in its campus support … [to ensure] the success of this initiative.”

Memorial held for freshman

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__Ben Gutenberg ’11 died from injuries suffered in crash__

p. Ben Gutenberg ’11 passed away at the Virginia Commonwealth University Medical Center Tuesday afternoon due to injuries sustained in a Nov. 10 car accident near Richmond. The crash also killed fencing coach Pete Conomikes and injured two other students.

p. Gutenberg was in critical condition until his death, though his original prognosis was hopeful, said father Jeff Gutenberg during the memorial service held yesterday.

p. At first, doctors said he was expected to come out of the coma, but days later they discovered that his two front carotid arteries were damaged. The inadequate blood supply caused irreversible damage that ultimately resulted in his death Tuesday.

p. Gutenberg’s parents and the College administration organized the memorial service that took place in the Wren Chapel at 11 a.m. yesterday. His sister Laurel Gutenberg, College President Gene Nichol, fencing team Co-captain Tom Hennig ’08 and father Jeff Gutenberg spoke.

p. Fencing team members also gave a final salute and laid swords at the front of the chapel. Friends and fellow residents of Nicholson Hall also attended.

p. “He was quite optimistic and always enjoyed hanging out with his hall,” hallmate Edward Radue ’11 said. “The best way to describe Ben was that he was an individual. He walked to his own beat, and nothing could deter him from that.”

p. Gutenberg was from Rochester, N.Y. He was a fan of science fiction and fantasy, and his sister read excerpts from Tolkien and Star Trek during his memorial. He also had an interest in history, roommate Jonathan Fallen ’11 said.

p. “Ben was a very smart and funny guy. He was easy to get along with. He was very respectful,” Fallen said. “I was honored to have him as a roommate. He will be missed by me and our whole hall.”

p. Friends and family are still coping with his death.

p. “When I first heard the news, shock and numbness were pretty much what I was feeling,” Radue said. “I knew that he was not doing as well as could be hoped, but it was still hard to hear the tragic news. He will certainly be missed by those who knew him.”

p. A memorial for Conomikes, a coach of 35 years, was held Nov. 16 in the University Center.

That Girl: Tina Ho

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p. Tina Ho is the human version of the energizer bunny. Her current involvements range from serving as the student representative to the Board of Visitors to being a youth soccer coach. Every Wednesday night when the clock hits 10:30 p.m., a group of students leave their study groups and late night meetings to rance their way down D.O.G. Street. Tina, as usual leads the pack. This week’s That Girl discusses her reconstructive surgeries, her passion for medicine, and the true art of rancing.

p. What attracted you to the College?

p. I mainly came to William and Mary because of the Murray Scholar Program, which really sealed deal for me. The scholarship provides the equivalent of full in-state tuition for four incoming students and ensured the opportunity and attention I would get here. What I didn’t know at the time was how perfect of a fit William and Mary would be for me … the service oriented campus is what I needed to nurture my own passion for service. I’ve realized how amazing William and Mary itself is, beyond the program, because of the breadth of opportunities within the classroom or on campus. I also knew that William and Mary would prepare me well pre-med wise. If I was able to do well here, I knew I would have just as good of a chance being accepted to top medical schools as if I had gone to a private or Ivy-caliber school.

p. How did studying at Oxford last semester help to prepare you for medical school?

p. Oh, I’m homesick for Oxford. The whole academic experience itself was incredibly rewarding. The school has a tutorial system where you meet once a week with your professor for an hour. It was typical to have a paper due every week and, as a science major who does not write papers often or enjoy them as much, it was initially a real challenge. I would have a list of 10 books and would have to get them, read them, and then write my paper. At the tutorial session, the professor might ask me to read or summarize the paper and would sometimes challenge my ideas on the spot. It was really nice and invigorating not to be doing something for a grade, but rather for the learning experience. The discussions allowed me to become much more assertive and confident in a discussion kind of environment or atmosphere.

p. What spurred your initial interest in medicine?

p. One thing a lot of people don’t know about me is that I have experienced eight reconstructive surgeries between birth and the fourth grade. Basically, I was born with a nevus on the side of my head, which is a large mole or pigmented area. It could have been potentially cancerous so, through several surgeries, we had it removed. At one point, I had balloons in my scalp for tissue expansion. Ten years of my life were consumed by tiresome check-ups, appointments and nights spent at the hospital.

p. The inspiration for [studying medicine], however, is my grandfather. He started work early in his teenage years to support his several younger siblings and even spent seven years in prison while part of a resistance force against French occupation. The father of five successful children, this was a selfless man who sacrificed himself for the well-being of others. All he wanted was for an individual in his family to become a doctor. Although my grandfather will never know my future that I am so dedicated to fulfill for him, I am fortunate enough to have been able to meet my role-model once and experience firsthand the great man he was. I just hope.

p. You’re currently seeing the other side of reconstructive surgery. Can you tell me about your experiences at Operation Smile?

p. I first learned about Operation Smile when I visited Princeton during their Admittance Weekend my senior year in high school. At some point, I learned the non-profit was based in Norfolk, and through a component of the Murray Scholarship, looked to gain exposure to a different type of medical experience being that it was on the non-profit side. Given my history and service values, I also though it might be a possible direction I’d want to take with medicine. Last spring, I called about internship opportunities and filled out one of their applications. One of the co-founders of the organization called me from Los Angeles to find out more about what I was hoping to get out of the experience which really impressed me. I have been interning there in the office of the CEO and their education department since that call.

p. Your passion for rancing transferred over to even your medical school essays. When did your involvement with that start and how would you describe what it is?

p. The art of rancing (running and dancing at the same time) has become my favorite pastime in college. It is a pastime that I was introduced to only one year ago, yet defines the essence of the individual I have matured into during my collegiate career. It is a phenomenon hard to describe just in words. For me, this outdoors activity is defined as a simultaneous combination of running and dancing to the tune of an iPod or other exclusive music source. Rancing is a pre-planned event, but occurs as a spontaneous process.

Everyone’s a little bit bisexual, sometimes

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p. To some people, bisexuality is an offensive concept; some see it as trying to have your cake and eat it, too.

p. It does open a veritable buffet of sexual possibilities, but bisexuality isn’t about being confused or indecisive about which sex to date. It’s more about being attracted to an individual, not necessarily their sexual organs.

p. Isn’t this a concept we apply to relationships all the time? Everyone wants to be liked for who they are rather than what they are; bisexuality exemplifies that philosophy. Whether you think you are or not, almost everyone’s a little bit bisexual.

p. Most people place themselves at one of the extremes of the Kinsey scale. However, in actuality, they probably fall somewhere in the middle. It’s completely normal for gay people to find the opposite gender sexually appealing. On the same token, straight people can find members of the same gender alluring.

p. This isn’t to say that everyone’s up for changing the scenery of their sexual orientation, but it’s something to think about. If you’re truly looking for love, maybe you shouldn’t write off half of the population. Just because if flows against social norms, or because you simply hadn’t considered it, doesn’t mean that a person of the same sex isn’t worthwhile. The love of your life — or the shag of your life — could be in the bathroom stall right beside you.

p. If you’re homophobic or heterophobic you may have already stopped reading. If you haven’t, you’re probably trying to convince yourself that you’re not in a gray area — that you’re one of the few purely straight or gay people in the world and proud of it. If you’re still repeating the names of all the people you’ve slept with just to reaffirm it, breathe easy. No one is saying that because you’re in college you must be sexually curious and live out every crazy experience possible. However, it might simply be that you haven’t found a person outside of your normal scope to whom you’re attracted.

p. Think about the feelings you get when you look at a totally hot girl or guy: nervous tingles, increased salivation or the size of your eyes. That chemistry occurs when you see someone you want. Have you ever had one of those “I think I might be gay” moments? It’s more than seeing a guy or girl and appreciating his or her attractiveness. It’s the same urge you get when you see any crush — this one simply happens to have different equipment.

p. If you’re still unsure whether you’re really releasing a little inner-bisexuality, that warm sensation right around the crotch region is a good indicator as well.

p. Whether you should reevaluate your sexuality depends on how you look at it. Some people think they are straight for a long time simply because they’ve convinced themselves of the “fact.” Then, when they meet a person that really does it for them, they suddenly “discover” that they’re actually gay.

p. Don’t worry about the label that comes with your decisions regarding sexual orientation or the actions you take while following those urges. It’s much simpler to admit to yourself that you know what personality or body type you’re looking for. Whoever fits the bill is yours for the night.

p. Once in the bedroom, it is time to stop thinking of your crush as just a great personality without regard for what’s downstairs. The type of equipment you’ve both got dictates the kind of fun you can have. For an initial bisexual experience, this will probably create the most anxiety. After all it’s like losing your virginity all over again.

p. Welcome that feeling of awkwardness with open arms. Don’t be afraid to tell your partner that this is your first time with his or her gender, and that you might need a bit of coaching. Take some time to be creative. If you’re with the same sex, try out touching them the way you like being touched. If you’re going for the opposite sex for the first time, it’s a completely different adventure. Let your partner guide you; the sexual chemistry should take care of the rest.

p. It’s your choice as to whether or not you act on your impulse if and when you feel that chemistry. My advice is to go for it. However, it is important to remember there are the same sexual risks apply to sex. They might reject you — maybe because they aren’t comfortable with bisexuality, or they’re not that into you — but, if they seem to accept your advances, give yourself a hand. You’ve just left one end of the spectrum and have entered a wonderfully blurry gray land. You can to go back to where you came from, travel to the other side or just chill in limbo forever.

p. Emily Powell is the sex columnist for the Flat Hat. She has a girl-crush on Kate Prengaman.

Student dancers make their pointe

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p. Sunday at 2 p.m. in the University Center Commonwealth Auditorium, the College’s student-run dance company, Pointe Blank, will perform its fall semester show.

p. The show will feature 14 dances and should run about an hour and a half.

p. “[The show] will be hosted by emcees from 7th Grade Sketch Comedy,” Lisa Bateman ’09 said. “We have jazz, lyrical, Pointe, tap, hip-hop and modern dances, as well as a Christmas-themed Rockette-style kick line.”

p. Bateman, who has been a member of the company for three years, joined because Pointe Blank offered the type of dance style that interested her. The opportunity for members to choreograph their own dances was another lure.

p. All the dances in Sunday’s show were choreographed by the current company, which consists of 29 members. New members are selected based on their performance and attitude exhibited during tryouts held in the fall of each year. With the company members changing somewhat annually, each year’s show offers something different.

p. “Past shows have had the same variety because our members all have different areas of dance that interest them. One difference in this semester’s show is that the two male members of the company are not able to perform, so the entire show will feature our female members,” President Jennie McFaden ’09 said.

p. Each year since the founding of Pointe Blank in 1995, the group has put on one show per semester, usually in November and April. The company has been rehearsing since the beginning of the semester.

p. “The show is going to be pretty hot,” Lauren Williams ’09 said. “We’ve got a really talented group this year and a lot of variety in the choreography, so it’s definitely something worth seeing. Plus, since it’s in December, we’ll be throwing in a little holiday cheer.”

p. Because the dances are so diverse and range from ballet and jazz to hip-hop and modern, according to McFaden, the organization attracts a wide variety of dancers, creating a unique atmosphere.

p. “Pointe Blank is a good group of people, laid-back and fun to be around,” McFaden said. “When I was offered an opportunity to be in charge of something I enjoy and get to know people in the company better, I had to take it.”

p. Williams, who has been with the company since her freshman year, agrees that one of the reasons she tried out for Pointe Blank was its members.

p. “I joined because dancing is a great way to relieve stress and because the group seemed like a whole lot of fun,” she said. “I also wanted to mix up my modern curriculum with a variety of dance styles.”

p. Tickets for the show will be on sale in the UC outside the auditorium before the show. They will cost $4, with $1 of every ticket going to the College’s chapter of Habitat for Humanity.

p. According to Bateman, the group was careful to schedule the show around Grand Illumination.

p. “The show’s going to be a good one,” McFaden said. “We’ve got great dancers and awesome emcees.”

Have yourself a boozy little Christmas

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p. With Thanksgiving having come and gone, the Savino matriarch has begun assembling a to-do list and, more importantly, a to-give list for Christmas. Last year my sisters and I each received mini-bottles in our crocheted stockings to put in the morning’s coffee: Kahlua, Frangelico, Disaronno and Starbucks liqueur — all recommended. But does waking up to alcohol mean that the innocence of my youth is gone?

p. I have taken a picture with the Macy’s Herald Square Santaland Santa — the real one — every year of my life. I cried at three months, slept at 15 months, cried again at two years. At first, it was cute, and then it was a little pathetic by the time I was around 12, but it hit its full stride of irony at the age of 15. Can I really go this year, and will I need a pre-Christmas mini-bottle?

p. While preparing my wish list for my mother, I realized that a leather portfolio, briefcase and business suit wouldn’t be the kind of things Santa was likely to shove down our non-existent chimney. No, this year there was nothing I wanted that could be wrapped up and put under the tree. It looks like it will be another alcohol-filled Christmas.

p. My father is thrilled.

p. As a senior, I’m only a few months away from hypothetical autonomy — both social and financial. My graduation from the College also marks my graduation from Christmas. As my mother has already told me several times, “This is your last Christmas, Charls.”

p. Am I going to die on Boxing Day?

p. Well, the Christmas spirit of my childhood will, apparently.

p. And nobody seems to be particularly concerned. Both sisters — 10 and 12 years my senior — have been counting down the days until my 21st birthday, and now that the day has finally come and gone, all family traditions are out the window. On my 21st, one sister wrote, “I have been waiting for this day since you were born. Does this mean we can start going to Vegas for Christmas now?”

p. I suppose Vegas would be a refreshing change of pace. Chips in one’s stocking, lots of spiked punch, maybe a Christmas strip-tacular, no presents, no stress. Booze, nudity and gambling — everything my family has been looking forward to for years.

p. We skipped the big family Christmas two years ago. The Savino clan holed up in our beach house with meatloaf (the food, not the singer), DVDs and, again, booze. Apparently, that day can never be recreated again; it was too perfect and too isolated.

p. As it stands now, one sister won’t be around for Christmas, nobody even called each other for Thanksgiving and I won’t be going out for New Year’s Eve. Are the holiday traditions just going to lie dormant until one of us has a baby? I certainly hope not — none of us plans to be knocked up anytime soon.

p. Instead of eating advent calendar chocolates like in years past, I get to tick off all of my essays and deadlines as each day ends. I’m working more hours, scrambling for last minute money for gifts. All for what? Sitting around an empty apartment with gimlets and a “Law and Order” marathon? Perhaps, if that’s what keeps the family together. Sam Waterston can be my new Santa.

p. Perhaps now is the time to make some new traditions: The Savino daughters are looking for a mini-bottle encore, but maybe yours will be different. It could be time to transition pajama lounging into brunch or ordering-in Chinese food. I realize now, under the duress of finals, graduate school applications and senior year, that my yearning for Christmas is just the need to return to stability — as boozy as it may be.

p. So I suppose I don’t need my Christmas tree or even to go home, so long as the Christmas spirits are flowing and my family is around.

p. Charlotte Savino is a Confusion Corner columnist. For Christmas, she’s asking Santa for a leather portfolio, a gimlet and a pony.

It’s Christmastime in Williamsburg

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p. Williamsburg and the College know how to do Christmas right, with fireworks, truckloads of evergreen, charity and tradition — lots of tradition.

p. Every year, students returning from Thanksgiving break anticipate the best kick-off of the Christmas season. One of the most popular events in Williamsburg, Grand Illumination, held on Duke of Gloucester Street, draws thousands of people to the city to see a Christmas fireworks show of colonial-era splendor.

p. The show itself — running for the 50th time this year — is one-of-a-kind.

p. “We use fireworks that are really in the spirit of the 17th-century tradition,” Michael Fox, vice president of Pyrotecnico, a Pennsylvania-based fireworks company and lead tech for Grand Illumination, said. “We tailor the show to something you could [have possibly seen] at that time, historically.”

p. This means creating a visually stunning show rather than a loud one, consisting of so many fireworks that even the company can’t count them. Fox also understands the historical importance of the show’s location, and is working hard to make sure that both the holiday decorations — and the buildings they decorate — stay intact.

p. “You’re shooting right beside something that would be very difficult to replace,” he said. “It’s a very difficult situation.”

p. The difficulty of creating the Grand Illumination show is mirrored in the behind-the-scenes creation of a colonial Christmas on DoG Street. Strolling up the street a few hours before the fireworks will reveal a town transformed by fresh holly, traditional fruit wreaths and miles of fresh evergreen adorning the windows and doors of homes and shops. Christmases of the yore are perfectly and painstakingly recreated for tourists and students, all in the name of a traditional holiday season.

p. The warmth of the holidays and love of tradition are just as important on campus as they are on DoG Street. For over 20 years, the College has hosted Green and Gold Christmas, an event that embodies the ideals of the season in a day of charity, generosity and fun. Underprivileged children in the Williamsburg area are invited, free of charge, to the College for an early Christmas.

p. Randi Lassiter ’08, chair of Green and Gold Christmas, hopes to spread holiday cheer.

p. “I just really love Christmas, and I don’t want to see kids not be able to have a good Christmas,” she said. “It’s not that all the children won’t have a Christmas, it’s just that maybe their families are financially strapped. All of them are from underprivileged backgrounds.”

p. The morning of Dec. 8, hundreds of children will gather in the University Center, bright with anticipation and energy, to be matched with a waiting student. For the next four hours, the kids are the bosses; the college students get to be a little kids again. Christmas cookie decorating, arts and crafts, toys, Santa and an enormous inflatable obstacle course make this a day that the kids will remember throughout the next year.

p. “They really enjoy it,” Lassiter said. “I just hear from a lot of parents, ‘When is Green and Gold Christmas coming up? My kids want to know.’ It’s really a serious thing; the kids will ask about this months in advance so their parents will make sure they can come.”

p. Being a student chaperone can be tiring, but it is immensely rewarding. And the best part? “The blow-up obstacle course,” Lassiter said. “People need to sign up. This is a really great cause and I think that people will have a lot of fun. They shouldn’t focus on exams coming up, just come out anyway.”

p. Another popular exam break comes in the form of one of the best-loved holiday traditions at the College. Nothing says holiday cheer — and halfway through exams — quite like the Yule Log ceremony, which will take place Dec. 15 at 6 p.m. Students gather together with friends in the dark chill of the Wren Courtyard to remember all of the good things about the College and the holidays — friends, tradition, carols and community. In the spirit of the season, several student organizations come together to tell the story of the holidays for their respective religions, including Hillel, the Persian Student Organization, the Black Student Organization and others.

p. “I really like the Yule Log Ceremony,” Lassiter said. “It just makes it feel so official; the holidays are really coming up. It just has that almost-going-home feel. When Yule Log comes around, it just really feels right.”

p. Brooke Tortorella ’08, vice president of Mortar Board, the organization that co-sponsors the ceremony with Omicron Delta Kappa, couldn’t agree more.

p. “I’m a senior this year, and I wanted to be involved in something that was more traditional to William and Mary,” she said. “I thought this was a good opportunity to do that. I mean, I love Yule Log. Everybody does. It’s fun.”

p. Mortar Board and ODK also try to foster the spirit of seasonal giving by conducting a coin drive during the week leading up to Yule Log. This year, the money collected will go to Bright Beginnings and the Academy for Life and Learning, which benefit public education in Williamsburg-James City County for underprivileged and long-term suspended students, respectively.

p. This marks the 77th year the ceremony has taken place, and it promises to capture the spirit of the holidays once again. Whether it’s the carols sung by the choir and the Gentlemen of the College, Vice President for Student Affairs Sam Sadler’s reading of “’Twas the Night before Finals,” College President Gene Nichol’s Santa suit and retelling of “How the Grinch Stole Christmas” or throwing a sprig of holly onto the Yule log for good luck in the coming year, there’s something about the ceremony that draws students every winter and creates memories of holiday traditions that will endure for years.

p. “I really just think it’s kind of nostalgic to be thinking, ‘Oh, next year’s my last semester,’” Tortorella said. “I’ll definitely miss William and Mary and all the traditions, so I’m really happy that I got to be a part of the event you kind of feel like you left your mark in a way, in something more traditional than just taking class. It’s meaningful, I think.”

p. That meaningfulness abounds here at theCollege. At a time when finals can make even the most avid Christmas lover a Scrooge, long-held and beloved traditions, along with a good dose of generosity and charity, can take the chill out of the air and restore cheer to the weary student.

p. “When I came back after Thanksgiving, I peeked into Williamsburg and all the trees were decorated, and that was nice to see,” Tortorella said. “It kind of lifts your spirits.”

Freshman succumbs to injuries from November accident

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p. According to an email from College President Gene Nichol, freshman Ben Gutenberg, who had sustained injuries from a car accident while on a College fencing trip Nov. 10, died in Richmond Tuesday.

p. The team’s coach, Peter Conomikes, also died in the accident after the car he was driving on Interstate 95 crashed near Richmond.

p. Printed below is Nichol’s email:

p. Dear Students, Faculty, and Staff:

p. Earlier this afternoon, freshman Ben Gutenberg, injured in the automobile accident that struck our fencing team two weeks ago, passed away in Richmond. It is literally impossible to describe how heartbreaking the news is for Ben’s parents, for his teammates, for those who treasured his friendship on the campus and beyond. Their grief, and ours, is past bearing.

p. While we continue to reach out to those close to Ben, all of us should remember that the Counseling Center staff stands ready to help. Additionally, the Wren Chapel will be available throughout the day tomorrow for personal reflection. We are working with Ben’s family on a memorial service to be held later this week. Vice President Sadler or I will be in touch again soon.

p. As our fencers have taught in recent days, the College, at its core, embodies a defining commitment to one another. We’ll call on that powerfully in the days and weeks ahead.

p. Gene Nichol

‘Hvarf/Heim’ offers both new and old

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No, there aren’t a bunch of typos in the title, which means that, yes, this is a review of a non-English speaking band.

p. In fact, Sigur Rós lead singer Jon Birgisson’s lyrics aren’t in any real language, but are a sort of well-practiced gibberish. This makes the group, in theory at least, an instrumental band unlike any other. The band’s songs rarely dip below the five-minute mark. They sometimes feature a full orchestra, a wind chime, electronic noises, jazzy horns, power chords and even the occasional silence behind a burgeoning falsetto. Sigur Rós seems willing to try anything in order to better capture its sound, which could be described as the score to the landscape of Iceland. As weird and indie as you might think a band whose songs sound like icebergs melting is, you might just fall in love with the weird and wonderful world of Iceland’s biggest band of all time.

p.If that doesn’t sound like a particularly impressive feat to you, you’re probably not Icelandic. No instrumental rock band has stretched its genre further than Sigur Rós. The band’s emotional experimentation and haunting, sometimes alien, arrangements are about as hard to place in a musical genre as old-school ring tones.

p. The group has created a cinematic atmosphere that speaks a new language to the listener, both literally and figuratively. Instruments melt together into long tonal syllables of an unknowable tongue. Sound dramatic? That’s exactly how I would describe it.

p. The band’s newest release, “Hvarf/Heim,” is a two-disc album released as a tie-in with the group’s upcoming documentary “Heim” (translation: “At Home”). The documentary will finally unite images of Iceland with their musical equivalent, as it follows Sigur Rós on its 2006 tour of its homeland. As a companion soundtrack, “Hvarf/Heim” does not offer completely new material, but rather is a disc of rarities and unreleased tracks and a disc of more intimate acoustic performances of the group’s most famous songs.

p. For most bands, this would be a limited endeavor of passing importance. A half-step toward a new album. A tiring exploration of the well known. A safe and unadventurous run through. A reworking of something old. And yet when Sigur Rós gets your full attention, sits you down and grabs you by the ears, it is hard not to melt for Birgisson’s piercing falsetto every time. It is hard to say that this album is any less epic and engrossing than any of their others just because it doesn’t offer much change.

p. To say that the opening track, “Salka,” eases you into the album is a bit of an understatement. In fact, some people might see credits rolling as they make their way through all seven minutes. The second track, “Hljómalind,” could easily capture the final scenes of a movie as Sigur Rós cuts through all of Iceland in a sort of slow, panning shot.

p. Continuing to move backwards, “Í Gaer” really picks up the slack and reaches what one could call the climax of the album, with vibraphones dangling their beautiful music box notes in the air before freight train guitar riffs run it into the background. This epic yet soft spoken anthem represents everything that Sigur Rós is about. In fact, besides being the strongest song on the album, it has been a tour-de-force signature of the band’s live shows for years, without ever appearing on a record until now.

p. As for the rest of the album, it seems to swipe at the same cinematic greatness, but fails in being all that recognizable on its own. “Hafsól” has a surprising amount of energy, but that doesn’t save the song from its long, unfocused tour of deep space.

p. The acoustic tinkerings of “Heim,” unfortunately, don’t offer much new music to fans of the original versions. Contrary to what one may first think, these new renditions sound pretty spot on to their original recordings. After all, Sigur Rós is an atmospheric experience, not a jazz super group. Different takes are going to come off with all the same adjectives, unless you count “less epic,” “slightly softer” or “a tiny bit more intimate” as ground-breaking descriptives.

p. While still waiting for the band’s newest full-length to come out, “Hvarf/Heim” does well to feed the appetite of the starving Sigur Rós fan and would be a great introduction to someone just discovering the band. Considering that some of the unreleased material isn’t particularly strong and without much new material, even Sigur Rós cannot blow us away with something we’ve pretty much heard before.