Today marks the last time that The Flat Hat will print this academic year. Before you start breaking down in tears or celebrating in various ways, we’ve got some last-minute reflections for you. This year has seen a number of interesting changes and events take place, and we’ve been right here throughout. Take a look at our picks for the best and worst moments of the past academic year.
p. Cheers to President Nichol for his charisma and genuinely eloquent voice, particularly in offering assistance to the Virginia Tech community. Also, cheers to Nichol for his sweat-soaked toast at the King and Queen Ball. It was enjoyable and memorable, even though some of us can’t remember it.
p. Jeers to President Nichol for his misguided, clandestine decision to remove the Wren cross without consulting the campus community.
p. Cheers to the Student Assembly senate for passing a bill to provide free blue books to students.
p. Jeers to the senate for doing little else.
p. Cheers to UCAB for its yellow shirts and providing The Flat Hat with a feature photo during its game night.
p. Jeers to UCAB for My Chemical Romance, wasting student funds and slaughtering everyone’s hope for a successful spring concert.
p. Cheers to the city of Williamsburg for …
p. Jeers to the city of Williamsburg for, well, everything. Specifically, the City Council’s anti-student behavior, the zoning administration’s eviction warnings to students, the almost impossible task of registering to vote in Williamsburg and the city’s refusal to abandon ship on the three-person housing rule.
Cheers to Unit K.
p. Jeers to Unit L.
p. Cheers to Ukrop’s — the store.
p. Jeers to Ukrop Drive.
p. Cheers to McGlothlin-Street Hall for being an above-average academic building.
p. Jeers to Jim McGlothlin for being a below-average alumnus — $12 million below average.
p. Cheers to junior Shariff Tanious for proposing a bill that would have dissolved the SA senate.
p. Jeers to Tanious for consistently being a horrendously ineffective senator who received an “F” on The Flat Hat’s senate report card, and who spends his time playing computer games during senate meetings. Vote Matt Brown for Class of 2008 vice president for advocacy.
p. Cheers to Queen Elizabeth II for gracing campus with her presence this Friday and getting classes canceled.
p. Jeers to Prince Charles.
p. Cheers to the men’s cross country, women’s tennis, women’s swimming and women’s soccer teams for their successful seasons.
p. Jeers to the NCAA for plucking the College’s feathers, despite the presence of several more offensive mascots and symbols in college athletics.
p. Cheers to the new parking garage.
p. Jeers to the rising cost of parking stickers and overpriced tickets, as well as the parking services personnel in general.
p. Cheers to the admissions office for continuing efforts to diversify campus.
p. Jeers to the admissions office for not being forthcoming and timely with its statistics.
p. Cheers to the new online housing lottery.
p. Jeers to the excessive number of students bumped this year. Along these same lines, jeers to the College and Residence Life for not providing other suitable housing options.
p. Cheers to alcohol and alcohol amnesty.
p. Jeers to the campus alcohol policy in general.
p. Cheers to summer. We’ll see you in the fall.
p. Go Tribe. Hark Upon the Gale.