A slight burning sensation

Your Student Assembly unanimously passed the Student Health Act during Tuesday’s meeting, allocating up to $13,000 from the consolidated reserve to subsidize STI testing from the student health center for this academic year. I have to admit that I have been a little hard on the SA this year, but no longer.

Frankly, I’m really excited about this bill. It’s a lot of money that can do nothing but help students — more so than any other bill passed this semester and, if my memory serves me, more than any bill passed last semester.

There is an overwhelming amount of sexual frustration on this campus and I would like to think it’s because STI tests can do serious damage to a student’s budget. Once this legislation goes into effect, students can rest easy knowing that sex with a questionable partner need not result in months of pensive self-examination.

Just take a walk over to the Student Health Center and become a functioning member of our healthy, sexually active campus community.

So relax, have some sex, and if you see anything that looks like it shouldn’t be there or feel a slight burning sensation during urination, get tested. Thanks to your SA, it’s free.

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