Scott Brown is this year’s Mr. William and Mary for a reason. He’s got it all: charisma, radiantly approachable attitude, great taste in eveningwear. His charm spans four spoken languages, and though his conversation of the world is fast-paced and smart, his love for things nearest and dearest — his family, his dog shelter, his softball team — requires no translation. That Guy describes the perks of W&M stardom, where to buy briefs in waist size 83 and how to sweet-talk one’s way out of death in the desert.

**So, Mr. William and Mary, what’s your talent?**

p. My talent was a three-part blitzkrieg. I began with some karaoke to “God Must Have Spent a Little More Time on You,” then I moved into a beatbox, which I’ve been doing seriously since a young age and then I moved into some free-styling. I also had a bit of a costume change: I went from my somewhat conservative Northface into my Biggie Smalls shirt with my ten-point Jewish star and the rest of my bling.

**So what would you say sealed the deal for you?**

p. I think I look very good in a black bikini. I also had Clay Clemens’s name tattooed on my ass. There was a big heart with Clay’s name on it with an arrow through it. Plus Larry the Caf man and I had a natural banter as appreciators of food. I took the eveningwear seriously: I wore red and black — very sexy, very classy.

**Are people treating you differently?**

p. During Campus Golf I brought a dog out with me. I work at a dog shelter during the week, and on Saturday I brought one of my dogs out — it’s a total chick magnet, by the way — and people came up to me saying “Hey, I know you!” People have been wonderful about the whole thing, very gracious.

**You’re an Arabic and Middle Eastern Studies major. Where does your interest come from?**

p. Growing up my parents would always leave the TV on, so when I was playing with my Lincoln Logs I was also watching CNN. I have an insatiable appetite for the world, and I always loved knowing what was going on. The Middle East was kind of natural for me to go into, but then of course 9/11 happened.

**Tell me about Tunisia.**

p. The people were so incredibly gracious. I got invited to weddings, received marriage proposals, bargained in the markets. Riding a camel in the Sahara Desert was one of the greatest experiences of my life. Standing on the Algerian border where they filmed the Star Wars pod race, the berbers, going out and spending the night with drunk Tunisian students — it’s just such a different country. It’s a dictatorship, so the president’s face is everywhere. I survived, and there’s nothing I love to do more than sit outside at night smoking sheesha, drinking tea, talking with the old men about whatever. It was an incredible experience.

p. I almost died in the Sahara Desert. We were being approached by these desert nomads called berbers, and they offered to give these girls a ride on their beautiful Arabian horses. They were carrying swords and jewelry, and to make a long story short the professor told us not to take a ride because they would charge us. For example, if one of the girls had gone for a ride with them, he would have said, “Give me all your money or I’ll cut your throat.” It’s the middle of the desert, it’s 120 degrees at six in the morning, we’re 10 American college students, all white. So the girls didn’t take a ride but they did take pictures, and the guy said, “You will pay me now.”

p. I was the only one who spoke Arabic, so I went over and said, “Hellas,” which means ‘enough’ in Arabic. They looked at me like I had four heads. I said “That’s my wife, that’s my sister, and that’s my sister-in-law” — it’s very much a patriarchical society — “and you have no permission to speak to them.” The berbers asked where I was from, and I said Egypt, and they asked what city, and I said, “On the Nile.” They were basically sitting there smoking and wondering what to do, and I said, “If you don’t leave them alone I will tell the elder.” They don’t put up with harassment of tourists, it’s a crime. So they turned.to me and said in Arabic, “Tunisia and Egypt, in the Koran, we are brothers. I will let you go. I’m very sorry.” But ultimately I thought I was just going to be a headline on CNN News: Local, chubby, Jewish kid gets chopped up in the Sahara Desert. Remains are found in Oasis.

**Do you see these experiences playing out in your future?**

p. With the language skills, I’ve been sniffing around a little bit. I’ve made some trips to different government agencies, several varieties, including one that starts with a “C” and ends with an “IA” a couple of times. I’ve gotten one or two offers, but I want to keep my options open. I think next year’s plan is to spend the summer in Morocco and then go home to work at the family business, and then go to graduate school. For now, I’m taking it slow. I don’t want to pigeonhole myself.

**Since you bring it up — what’s the best part of working at a Big & Tall store?**

p. I started working in the store when I was five. My great-great-grandfather founded it in Boston in 1946, and it has been in my family 60 years. My father now works there, my mother works there; my grandfather, who is 83, still works there (in some capacity). We carry the largest sizes in the world. We carry up to waist size 90 and ship all over the world. We’ve fitted pro-athletes, celebrities. We ship to “Lost” (the big guy on “Lost” is one of our customers), Ted Williams (the greatest hitter of all time) is a customer of ours.

p. So that’s what I do over the summer and over Christmas break. Christmas season is basically known as tuition season in the Brown household. So if Jared from Subway is successful in convincing the country to go slim, I can’t go to college anymore. It’s not that I’m rooting for people to get fat, I just want to finish. Bigmen.com — shameless promotion, but it’s very important to me.

Some people might think that we at the College are totally above all the silliness that is “March Madness.” They assume that students at the College would never waste our precious studying, napping and “social faux pas” time worrying about the fate of athletes at schools we do not attend. They believe that our idea of victory is finding a seat at the library. They presume that, just because they sound like the delicious offerings at your neighborhood pre-made wrap stand, we cannot recognize the fine nuances between a “pick and roll” and a “give and go.” And to these naysayers I say … touché, but I also say, “Oh, we have the madness!” And we like it.

p. I would wager that here at the College, we appreciate March Madness more than those thankless wretches at places like UNC and Texas A&M. They take March Madness for granted. “Gosh, we won another basketball game? We’re some sort of champion, and we have another three-day celebration kegger? God, life is so tiresome; how I long for a nice, refreshing losing streak.”

p. We at the College, on the other hand, treasure the chance to vicariously live the life of athletics fans via the March Madness media mania (almost as much as we treasure the chance to use alliteration). Shoot, people have skipped classes to watch televised games. Do you understand the gravity of this situation? Students here go to classes in snow flurries, tropical storms and even on perfect days when they should really just be sitting in the Sunken Garden. Skipping class to sit alone in your bedroom and watch people you don’t know play a sport you may or may not understand is intense.

p. Aside from allowing our long-dormant primal sports fan some space to roam, what is it about NCAA basketball that gets our hearts pumping, our eyes twinkling and our prayer beads working?

p. I say it’s the gambling.

p. Bracket competitions are the muscle behind the madness. Brackets personalize the competition. When a person has a bracket, it’s not just some team she’s cheering for — she’s cheering to save her pride and to win some cash money. When a person’s chosen team loses, he’s not just another heartbroken fan; he’s subject to widespread humiliation at the hands of everyone else in his “pool.” If a person is on a winning streak, she gets bragging rights and an inflated sense of superiority — the kind that makes you want to post Facebook messages saying things like, “Eat it, newspaper nerds!” when you are currently winning your Flat Hat bracket. Yessssssss.

p. These are the sorts of things sports dreams are made of, no? I can just see the Georgetown (going all the way!) coach giving his halftime locker room speech. He doesn’t pansy around with talk of teamwork or pride or school spirit. He tells it like it is: “Guys, we need to step it up. Thousands, nay, millions of people are counting on you. Do you want your bracketeers to be the butt of office jokes tomorrow because you couldn’t get it together? Do you want Lauren Bell’s big fat drop in the previous paragraph to be rendered null? I didn’t think so. Let’s do this — for the numbers.”

p. You don’t have to be a basketball fan to get in on the March Madness. You barely have to know what a basketball is or how it’s played. And if you — like many of us here at the College — harbor a deep psychological fear of sports, you don’t even have to watch the games (although I hear that yelling at the TV screen really helps your team to win). Just fill in some names on a bracket, then find someone who knows less than you to bet with (I hear newspaper people are easy pickings), and let the madness overtake you.

p. __Lauren Bell is a Confusion Corner columnist for The Flat Hat. She likes winning more than she likes basketball.__

The new policy regarding the placement of the cross within the Wren Chapel suggested by the Committee on Religion in a Public University presumably brings an end to the Wren cross controversy. However, it may usher new attention to College President Gene Nichol’s decisions, despite the fact that many on campus seemed to view the cross as a non-issue even while it garnered national media attention.

p. The conflict has brought the College’s donors to the forefront, as some withdrew their money. One such alumni was Margee Pierce, ’84, who joined the “No Cross, No Cash” listing on SavetheWrencross.org. She plans to continue donating upon the return of the cross, but she is now paying more attention to where her money is going.

p. “While I will resume donations, I will no longer give money to the Fund for William and Mary — or any unrestricted money that can be spent with minimal oversight,” she said. “I will carefully target my donations to the programs and projects that I can fully support and that fit with my values and goals.”

p. But her concern for the institution remained strong even though she did not agree with Nichol’s decision.

p. “I am concerned over the fact that our endowment is so much smaller than many peer institutions, especially the University of Virginia. I hope President Nichol and the Board can rebuild the relationships with alumni and friends of the College that have been broken during the course of the Wren cross controversy,” she said.

p. While Pierce feels Nichol has hurt the College’s relationships, Tom Mikula, ’48, has strengthened his own bond to the College in light of the recent controversy and has been trying to raise money to replace what may have been lost from disappointed donors. When he heard that a $12 million pledge had been revoked by a former major donor, Mikula decided to encourage people to donate in hopes that 1,000 people would donate $12,000 to make up the lost funds.

p. “Our purpose is to support President Nichol. We don’t believe his tenure is through; we believe that this may crop up again, and we’re ready to offer what support we can,” he said.

p. As of now, updated figures are not available, but money has been raised.

p. “I can say that people have come out and said that they favor what we’re doing,” he said. “And some have offered checks — probably the most substantial was $100,000. It is an ongoing endeavor.”

p. Our Campus United, a group that was heavily involved throughout the controversy and promoted keeping the debate within the College community, does not see the issue as changing anything fundamental at the College.

p. “This was not a legitimate issue — it was raised by a bunch of people trying make a political point. Therefore, it is unfair to say that this is going to change the way the school operates,” David Solimini, ’04, a leader of Our Campus United, said.

p. SavetheWrenCross.org gained attention from local and national newspapers, FOX News and CNN.

p. Our Campus United felt that SavetheWrenCross.org was using political pundits in a discussion that should have remained among the community members — though in the end the committee made the final decision as representatives of the community, satisfying Our Campus United.

p. “Did they get on TV more? Absolutely. But in the end the members of the community made the final decision,” Solimini said.

p. Now SavetheWrenCross.org and Our Campus United both support the Committee’s new decision, meaning a likely end to the national attention.

p. The cross’s position was settled in a private meeting after the last meeting of the Committee on Religion in a Public University March 6 in order to quell unrest surrounding the issue.

p. “The committee’s recommendation is unanimous. We hope that this policy regarding the display of the Wren cross will put this immediate controversy to rest,” Co-chairs Jim Livingston and Alan Meese said in a joint statement.

p. The final policy is that the cross will be displayed in a glass case with a plaque to commemorate the Chapel’s historical connection with Anglican religion and the Bruton Parish Church in Colonial Williamsburg. Additionally, the Wren sacristy will be available for sacred objects of any religion.

p. Though the Committee does not yet know how or where the glass case will be placed in the chapel, this and further study of religion in the public university will continue. The committee will meet both through this semester and into the next, Meese said.

Pending completion of an environmental survey to the satisfaction of Starbucks, The College Delly and Pizza Restaurant will end its 42-year history in Williamsburg July 1. According to Delly General Manager Ray Causey, Starbucks has maintained its interest throughout the year, and barring the unlikely event that the immediate area does not pass the Virginia Association of Hazardous Materials standards, an agreement between owner Dean Tsamouras and Starbucks will likely be reached soon.

p. Tsamouras has owned the Delly for 22 years and has long desired to maintain its name and tradition. However, recent offers from alumni and other interested parties to keep the name have not provided the same financial security as the offer from Starbucks. According to Tsamouras, he decided to sell the Delly last September, and Starbucks has been interested in the property since.

p. “Sometime in the middle of June is our target date for closing,” Causey said. He added that a final signing of the lease would likely take place within the next two weeks, and he believed that Starbucks’ target opening date would be October 1, 2007. Tsamouras said that while there was no official agreement, “a lot of things would have to happen for it to fall apart.”

p. Under the terms of the lease agreement, Starbucks would be the beneficiary of a 20-year agreement with two additional five-year options, while Tsamouras will remain landlord of the property. Tsamouras did not have an exact figure on the contract but did say that the full lease would consist of millions of dollars.

p. According to Causey, Tsamouras’ reasons for selling the Delly, which he has owned since April of 1986, are largely personal and family-related.

p. “You do see that people love and want to keep The College Delly, but that can’t really factor in your decision when you’re trying to support your family and retire,” Causey said. “[Tsamouras] really has been torn in this process. This is more for his family and for his health.”

p. Tsamouras is still considering one other prominent offer. However, he said that it was nowhere near what he had been seeking. “That guy offered me a quarter of what I wanted,” he said.

p. Causey agreed. “Starbucks has always been the forerunner, and most of the other offers have not been bona-fide,” he said.

p. “Dean [Tsamouras] was always entertaining the possibility for somebody else to carry on the College Delly name,” Causey said. “But these offers haven’t had the down payment or the separation that he desires.”

p. Nevertheless, Tsamouras still has hope that an offer may emerge that could save the College Delly name, but this hope has proved fruitless thus far as most offers have been nowhere near the value of the property.

p. “I’ve been waiting for someone to step up,” he said. “Unless someone came up here and wrote me a check, the Delly’s done.”

p. The initial report in The Flat Hat last September regarding the possibility of the sale of the Williamsburg landmark sparked debate over the future of the establishment. Petitions were signed, Facebook groups were created and the management of the Delly received countless questions and pleas from students, alums and Williamsburg residents.

p. “As the College Delly business, tradition and memory is in jeopardy of fading, offers to save it come out of the woodwork,” Causey said. “It’s the disappointment on the peoples’ faces that gets you. Everyone seems to say ‘I can’t believe you’re doing this.’ They see it as the corporate giant and the little nostalgic Delly, but I don’t know if that’s a good way to look at it.”

p. Causey said that Starbucks appealed to the management and owner of the Delly because of their reliability, punctuality and financial stability regarding the ownership. Tsamouras has been trying to put the Delly in the right hands for several years, but none of the offers were viable or secure enough. Causey also commented on many of the positive qualities of Starbucks, including their attentiveness to water quality and other environmental concerns.

p. It is these concerns that are delaying the final sale. According to Causey, Starbucks is waiting for the results of the ecological survey to discover whether there are any environmental conditions on the premises that could jeopardize future business.

p. “If Starbucks wasn’t happy with the environmental [situation], and they broke the contract, that would be the only way that it wouldn’t happen,” Causey said. He added that he was 95 percent sure that there would be a Starbucks next year, and said that he “didn’t expect any complications at this point.”

p. Tsamouras agreed, saying that the deal seemed to be reaching its final stages.

p. “The only thing that could really stop it is if the HazMat were to come back showing a high level of contamination,” he said.

p. Tsamouras added that he is considering another more stringent environmental survey run by The College Delly in addition to the one run by Starbucks. If the survey is completed, it will push back the timeline for Starbucks’ target opening date.

p. Kenny Fried, a Public Relations Representative for the Starbucks Corporation, said that until a final agreement was signed, the company could not comment on the proceedings.

p. Tsamouras, who plans to keep his College Delly softball team, has fond memories of his time at the Delly, particularly watching students grow.

p. “I love the kids. Students are the only ones that deserve an explanation from me,” he said. “They’re the only thing I’ll miss. To all the students that have touched my life, thanks for all of the memories.”

“Revolutionary City,” a Colonial Williamsburg program that was started last year in an effort to increase ticket sales, is undergoing some changes for the start of the 2007 tourist season.

p. “Revolutionary City” is a two-hour theater presentation that takes place on the streets of Colonial Williamsburg. Each program consists of seven scenes highlighting the events that occurred in Williamsburg prior to and during the American Revolution.

p. The action in the scenes of this year will look similar to last year’s. However there is now a more systematic schedule detailing which scenes will take place on what day. Tuesday, Thursday and Saturday, a program entitled “The Collapse of the Royal Government” will take place. On Wednesday, Friday and Sunday, “Citizens at War” will occur. A new program entitled “Nation Builders” will be performed Mondays.

p. Monday’s performance of “Nation Builders” includes scenes of famous founding fathers such as Thomas Jefferson, Patrick Henry and George Washington. There are also performances from lesser-known contributors to the founding of America. These characters discuss issues such as the Declaration of Independence’s impact on their lives.

p. The action in “The Collapse of the Royal Government” takes place between 1774 and 1776. Actor-interpreters perform the events that caused colonial Americans to turn against the British government prior to the Declaration of Independence.

p. “Citizens at War” contains scenes from 1776-1781 that reflect how the Revolutionary War affected Williamsburg citizens.

p. Street theater scenes are the core of the “Revolutionary City” program, but there are many other performances. “Revolutionary Stories,” a new program, consists of speeches from characters in the “Revolutionary City” scenes. These speeches serve to provide insight into the lives and goals of the characters from the “Revolutionary City” scenes. Characters include Lord and Lady Dunmore and Patrick Henry.

p. Another new program is “Revolutionary City After Dark,” an evening program that begins in April. “The Gunpowder Plot,” is a walking tour exploring the events of the Gunpowder Incident, and “A Capitol Ball” includes music and dance to celebrate the arrival of Lady Dunmore.

p. “Revolutionary City” began March 19. The main scenes take place between 2:30 and 4:30 p.m. and are open to College students. “Revolutionary Stories” will take place in the morning. Street theater scenes will take place along Duke of Gloucester Street from Botetourt Street to the Capitol, and “Revolutionary Stories” will take place at the Governor’s Palace.

Senator Shariff Tanious, a junior, introduced a bill that would dissolve the senate and delegate its powers to the Undergraduate Council. The Student Empowerment and Efficiency Act (SB 314) was introduced on the floor of the senate Tuesday, March 20 but failed to pass with a final vote of 2-18-0.

p. The bill would have needed two-thirds of the senate, the Undergraduate Council and the Graduate Council to vote in favor in order for it to be ratified.

p. Tanious, a two-term senator who is not running for re-election, introduced the bill in order to foster greater accountability and awareness among the student body concerning the senate’s activities. He focused specifically on its degree of effectiveness, the legislation being introduced and the issue of personal lobbying for funding of organizations by senators.

p. In the bill, he describes the senate as having “become an inefficient body to convey the needs and priorities of students.”

p. Tanious considers the senate to be an “inefficient middle step” in the process of implementing legislation and responding to the concerns of the student body, and he feels that many of the bills introduced in the senate are “bills of opinion.”

p. “I have not seen something that the senate has done that the idea wasn’t initiated or carried out by someone else in the Assembly,” Tanious said.

p. He proposes that the senate’s power be transferred to the Undergraduate Council to make it easier to implement legislation because enforcing senatorial responsibility for legislation is very difficult. The Council also works closer with the executive branch than it does the senate. Tanious will be running for vice president of advocacy for the Class of 2008 but stated that this had no influence on his bill.

p. “I feel that a lot of senators use the senate as almost a personal piggy-bank for clubs or organizations that they’re interested in, and they use the senate or their positions in the senate to basically fund those activities,” Tanious said. “I don’t find that okay, that they’re circumventing the process that everyone else has to go through [to obtain funding].”

p. When asked to comment on Tanious’s bill, several senators responded that they opposed the bill based on the opinion that Tanious has personally been ineffective in the senate.

p. “It is one of the worst bills I have ever seen proposed,” Sen. Joe Luppino-Esposito, a junior, said. “It is pathetic for a do-nothing senator to propose a bill like this and think that he is making a statement or a point. Had Sen. Tanious done anything of substance this year, perhaps this could be taken seriously.”

p. Other criticisms of Tanious included complaints that he uses his computer to engage in non-senate activities such as watching ESPN and reading the Drudge Report during senate meetings, that he rarely stays until the end of senate meetings and that he has only introduced one other bill this year. Tanious responded that every senator engages in similar computer activities during meetings and that other commitments have sometimes caused him to leave meetings early.

p. “I want the student government to represent the students and actually go out and do something for everyone, not just your group of friends or club, or even worse, no one at all,” Tanious said.