Dress up to satisfy your libido
November 16, 2007
Roleplay is a sexual adventure that can be adapted from the tamest fiction to a full-blown fantasy with all the accoutrements.
It’s about taking your fantasies and making them realities. Just because it’s roleplay doesn’t mean you necessarily have to be good at acting, though can be helpful.
p. If you think your partner might be offended by your fantasy or will laugh at you, then sharing your fantasy may not be a good idea. The backlash from releasing that information could cause permanent damage to your relationship, because every time you have sex they’ll know what you really want to do. A dominant-submissive fantasy can be healthy: As long as both of you trust each other and are clear on the rules you might give it the green light.
p. Acting out a one-person play is boring. If you didn’t have a partner in crime, why would you care whether your fantasies ever left your head? One of the sexiest parts of roleplay is the hardest: You’ve got to tell your partner about your favorite fantasy. This can be hard because sometimes it’s difficult to put words to a fantasy — all you can express is a feeling, a noise or a movement. Close your eyes and try to walk them through how it starts. Be detailed.
p. You can start your fantasy like this: “It’s like we’re on ‘Lost,’ and we’re the only ones on the island. Then it starts to rain and we huddle up close together.” Awkward to say out loud? Yes. Slightly nerdy? This is the College. Potentially hot? You bet.
p. It is best if you’re extremely explicit when describing your desires, and this all depends on how well you know and trust your partner. This is your time to let your partner know everything you’ve ever wanted, and it’s a huge turn-on for them.
p. For one, it’s better than watching a porno together or reading a sexy novel because they know this isn’t just how Fabio likes it, it’s how you want it. Second, think how much better playing out the fantasy will be if she does that thing with her tongue exactly how you dreamt it, or he makes sure to put you up on the desk the way you told him to.
p. Some ideas for roleplay are common. You could revert back to childhood and have one person be the patient and one be the doctor or nurse, get a little wild with Tarzan and Jane or grab a ruler and be the sexy professor.
p. Unique themes that say something about you are great as well. I had a friend tell me that his ultimate fantasy would be having a girl dress up as a nightelf priestess from World of Warcraft. There are probably many people who would echo that, but, personally, the male draenei have always caught my eye.
p. In short, don’t think about your fantasy as embarrassing or weird. If you’re with someone who cares about you, they want to hear your fantasies so they can fulfill your desires.
p. Having revealed your fantasy, let those creative juices flow. Depending on how extreme your ideas are, a trip to Big Lots or Target might be warranted. No matter what costume you choose, face makeup is not recommended because the amount of sweat you’ll produce later. The result could leave you looking like an Oompa Loompa.
p. To satisfy male fantasies, it might be enough to put on a push-up bra and some stilettos; and for some women a shirtless man and some changes in facial hair may suffice.
p. The sky is the limit, though, and if you decide to go big budget, there are plenty of online stores willing to help you. Your fun is really never over, because after your private show it’s time for you to take the stage.
p. __Emily Powell is the Flat Hat sex columnist. She owns a preying mantis costume.__