Most everyone has had the thought before. It seems like the most natural conclusion to make; it’s slippery, sexy and secluded, not to mention that you’re most likely going to be naked anyway. Why wouldn’t I want to have sex in the shower? However, for those who have given water sex a go, the conclusions were more than likely focused on its shortcomings and difficulties. While this article will be focusing on a lot of the misconceptions and roadblocks that go hand in hand with shower sex, it will also discuss some positive aspects of shower sex, along with potential solutions to many of its faults.
The first issue that rears its head is the matter of finding a good position. Of course, it is possible to simply have standing shower sex, but this usually isn’t particularly conducive to sex. The next natural response would likely be for at least one of the participants to go for a leg-raising maneuver. While this could be helpful, it would create a fairly high fall risk, even when assistance, such as grip mats or handlebars, are available. The third option, more specific to those who are pursuing penetration, would be for one participant to bend at the hip. This, however, can often lead the bender feeling like they’re practically drowning.
This inconvenience continues to be present while performing oral sex as well; water will typically run down your partner and may pool around your head, which isn’t very helpful for something that already limits breathing. No matter what position ends up working best for you, your best bet will be to redirect the showerhead away from your bodies, but that does start to take the “shower” out of “shower sex.
The next issue is the ever-present concern of lubrication. Despite water’s wetness, or, if you don’t buy into that whole “water is wet” idea, its capacity to make other objects wet, it causes more friction than it alleviates. In fact, water can easily wash away any natural lubrication that either partner may produce. This dilemma, however, is fairly easy to remedy with the proper lubricant. Firstly, water-based lube will in many cases be washed away just as easily as bodily lubrication. The next option is an oil-based lubricant. However, for those using condoms or similar protection, this option will negatively impact the integrity of the protection and will increase the risk of it breaking or tearing. The lubricant that checks off the most boxes would be one with a silicone base. While it is a bit more expensive, it won’t be easily washed away or greatly affect any protection being used. However, silicone allergies are fairly common, so be sure to run it by your partner(s) before application.
While we’re on the topic of lubricants in the shower, do not use soap or soap-based products as a lubricant. When soap comes into prolonged, pervasive contact it can leave the genitals uncomfortable and irritated. In fact, the use of soap on genitals, particularly pH insensitive soaps, can increase your risk for a yeast infection or a urinary tract infection.
Now that the biggest drawbacks of shower sex have been aired, it does have a fair amount of redeemable qualities that are worth mentioning. For one, shower play can be a very effective method of foreplay; no matter what, it is still sexy, slippery and secluded. It can be beneficial for those who are looking for a more passionate, steamy period of foreplay that can help break down awkwardness about coexisting in the nude. Additionally, shower play can help ease a lot of hygienic discomfort, especially if the post-shower activities are particularly cleanliness-sensitive, such as anal and analingus.
So, depending on what it is that you’re looking for in your sexual activities, the shower can still act as a viable option. Of course, be sure that your housing situation permits and is comfortable with shower activities occurring. The primary piece to remember is that the underprepared will probably experience a fair amount of strain or stoppages, but this is to be expected. You’ll at least know how to address your specific roadblocks for future sessions.
William W. is a Behind Closed Doors columnist who wants you to never use the shower head alone again.