Newsflash: SA accomplishes something for once

Your Student Assembly passed the Bike Theft Prevention Act, the DVD Act II, the Keep Swem Open During Finals Act, the Playoff Ticket Act and the Increased Transfer Housing Support Act during Tuesday night’s star-studded meeting, which was graced with the presence of imposing administrator Mark Constantine and Williamsburg City Councilman Paul Freiling ’83.

The Bike Theft Prevention Act allocates $800 from the consolidated reserve to purchase 50 $16 bolt cutter resistant locks to be sold at the police station and other locations for $8, with all proceeds going back into the reserve.

The DVD Act II allocates $480 from the reserve to purchase three popular TV titles each month of next semester to be placed on file in Swem. In the spirit of democracy, students will be allowed to vote for the shows they want to see on the SA website.

The Keep Swem Open During Finals Act allocates $2,672 from the reserve to keep Swem open overnight Dec. 6, 7, 9, 10, 13, 14, 15 and 16, with the majority of costs going towards the security and cleaning staffs.

The Playoff Ticket Act allocates $1,500 from the reserve to reimburse Tribal Fever after the group fronted the cost of the 300 student tickets distributed at last Saturday’s decisive playoff victory. The athletics department kindly agreed to split the cost of the $10 tickets with the SA.

I was honestly stunned by how productive this meeting was to the point that my inner-cynic suspects the SA of stacking its agenda just to impress all the fat cats in attendance. Nevertheless, ignoring the possibly ulterior motives of some senators, all of the aforementioned bills appear to be useful applications of student funds.

While you might be tempted to think that keeping Swem open and subsidizing bike locks is a tad more practical than paying for DVDs and football tickets, it’s important to realize that all the bills in question positively affect at least some aspect of student life. The SA’s funds are so immense that there is really no excuse for frugality — especially considering how much money the SA has been spending on things that include the term “TWAMP.”

Although less impactful than the other bills passed tonight, the Increased Transfer Student Housing Support Act endorses a plan to offer secure housing to transfers, most likely reserving a Unit or two. This is just an endorsement, but it is certainly a fair one. It is indefensible that transfer students are made to jump through hoops just to land spots in the worst housing on campus. If they are going to force transfers into the Units, the least the administration could do is guarantee them housing.

In other news, whoever went through the campus directory and figured out who was living in a house with more than two other people is a huge jerk. In response to those who think all I do is take cheap shots at the SA, I urge the SA to put their money to good use and pay all fines levied against the criminal masterminds who gave the College their actual address. You don’t even have to tell anyone it was my idea.


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