You’re talking to a smoking hottie who keeps touching you seductively and giving you eyes. But your friend won’t go away. You offer to take her somewhere more private, and he insists on coming. Even worse, he’s acting stupid and making you look bad.

You, my dear friend, are being cock blocked.

When trying to make a move, a cockblock actively interrupts you. The experience is frustrating, to say the least. Both men and women can be cock blocked, despite the latter’s lack thereof.

Now, I don’t know of any research, but I would venture to say that cock blocking is a tradition as old as flirting itself. But what would love and sex be without obstacles? The key is to understand and then overcome them.

Why do friends carry out this heinous act? More often than not it is a result of ignorance. They’re just not paying attention to what they’re doing. The solution? Be on the lookout for possible partnerings. No one wants to be that guy. And you may lose your wingman privileges if you don’t watch yourself.

Sometimes, however, there are more sinister motivations. Some cockblocks are jealous of their friend, wanting him or her to be alone, too — misery loves company. Avoid these people. They are not worth taking out with you if they can’t share in your happiness.

If you are one of these people, stop it. Just cut it out. Focus on your own quest for poontang instead of impeding others. Think of the golden rule, and then add your penis into the equation.

Still other cock-blocking efforts are borne of good intentions. Maybe your friend consistently hooks up with people who are bad for him, and you’re trying to protect him. Or maybe she told you before going out to make sure she didn’t hook up with anyone.

Both of these reasons are flawed. It is very sweet to protect your friend, but we’re all grown ups here. Everyone has to learn to take care of himself or herself, and it is no one’s right to judge what’s OK for someone else. If you have a friend who consistently needs your cock-blocking services, reconsider your friendship.

In this circumstance, there is one exception: Intervening is completely justified if you think your friend is putting himself or herself in a dangerous position. In that case, cock block away.

What can you do if you’re being cock blocked? In the long term, you can stop going out with that friend. This may seem harsh, but if your friend can’t let you express your sexual side, he is not really your friend.

Careful, though; don’t blame your friend for being a cockblock if the real problem is you. The truth is that in most situations you can escape a cockblock if both partners are truly interested in hooking up.

The easiest step is to pull your friend aside and talk to him — or send a text. Chances are he didn’t know. If he did know, he’ll give you his reason for consciously cock blocking you, to which you can respond, “You’re not allowed to control my sex life,” and then stick your tongue out — or do something else equally mature.

If the adult way won’t work, get crafty. Pretend you have Jack Bauer’s balls and find an escape route. Pawn your friend off on another person. Step up your flirting to make him feel uncomfortable and left out. This is a noble struggle for the sake of your genitals. Fight hard, and I think you’ll find that your friend’s resolve will eventually break.

If we all do our part we can eradicate — or at least alleviate — this societal plague.

__Maya Horowitz is the Flat Hat sex columnist. She wants to remind you that only you can prevent cockblocks, and forest fires.__

__Dressed in a blue pullover and a backward College of William and Mary baseball cap, Matt Wallace and I enjoys the unseasonably pleasant afternoon weather at the Daily Grind. I find out that he will be using his finance and accounting major to take the plunge into real life next fall by moving up to the Big Apple to start a job at Pricewaterhouse Coopers accounting firm. Charming and relaxed, this Kappa Sigma brother and future business associate is a master craftsman of iTunes playlists, has a keen interest in World War II, and is in the process of starting to bring a Livestrong chapter to the College.__

*How do you spend time on campus?*

I’m involved in Student Alumni Council and I was in the Howard [J.] Busby Finance Academy and the [Wayne F.] Gibb’s Accounting Society. I did Council for Fraternity Affairs stuff for a little, and College Partnership for Kids tutoring for a while. I’ve been starting Live Strong stuff here for a while, too. One of my friends and I went to a Livestrong Summit, which is where you apply to go and they teach you advocacy and ways to fundraise, and their CEO and Lance talk to you. In high school I was involved in [American] Cancer Society stuff. Cancer doesn’t discriminate and it can affect anyone, and it’s scary; so I think that anything that could help raise money to find a cure or build a support group for people who are going through it is really important.

*Have you ever been in a leadership position in your fraternity?*

I was social chair for two years. It’s a lot of work. It was a really good experience for me because I got to set up social events with people I was friends with… Middle School Madness was probably the best [party] theme and the most fun part was being able to make the playlists for the dance parties. I still make them.

*What can you not live without?*

My iPod or my music. It’s caused huge problems this semester and probably has affected my grade point average because my computer crashed and my iTunes wasn’t recognizing half my songs. Of course you can’t transfer them, so I had to do it manually. I have all my playlists with the playcounts and I didn’t want it to be all messed up.

*What do you do to relax?*

Hang out at my house, listen to music, work out, get out, definitely sit out on the Terrace, go to Corona Night or whatever it is. I’ve been to Mug Night [at the Green Leafe Cafe] a few times, but I really like Corona Night at Paul’s [Deli]. Of all the delis I’d say The Leafe is my favorite.

*What will you miss about the College when you head off in the spring?*

The people, number one. Also, the whole atmosphere; I went to high school in a city and I’m heading to New York after I graduate, so I’ll miss the people I’ve met, as well as the lax lifestyle and the Terrace.

*What excites you most about living in New York City?*

Well, I think I’m more excited about living in New York than about my job — you can go out anywhere at night — but what I’m really excited for are those Saturday mornings and what will get you awake and out and ready to go. I just feel like there’s always something to do in the city, something to see, places to go. I love the feeling of New York. I’m more lively and excited; [it’s] like a playground for adults.

*Are you excited about or dreading the 9-to-5 schedule?*

I sort of joke around, but the thing I’ll miss the most is when you just have those days when you’re exhausted and can’t take an afternoon nap, so that will be tough. I think the 9-to-5 thing forces you to manage your time, so I’ll just go to bed earlier.

*Any fun holiday traditions you’re looking forward to for Thanksgiving next week?*

Yeah, we always have a family soccer game — the old people against the young kids. Sometimes they give us a run for our money. We used to do T-shirts and stuff like that and we haven’t done that for the last couple of years because now that we’re older it’s kind of silly, but we still play and everything.

*What qualities do you value most in friends?*

First and foremost, honesty and when people are genuine. When you have those two qualities everything else kind of falls in line because you always have those friends who are the comedic relief, and then you are going to have the friends who are more serious and who you turn to for advice, or people you want to go have fun with: But if your friendships are based on honesty and trust, and they are genuinely good people, you can just focus on how you best relate to them.

*If you could have lunch with anyone from history who would it be?*

This sounds really morbid, but I would be fascinated to have lunch with [Adolf] Hitler. I took a class on the Holocaust with professor Marc Lee Raphael, who I love, and I had been to Munich and Dachau before. It sounds weird to say you’re fascinated with something like this, and obviously you don’t support what he did, but I’m definitely interested in the whole time period.

*Do you keep up with politics?*

Yeah, especially coming from [Washington,] D.C., I feel like I’ve kept up with it. I feel like I pick up on so much just being from the general area.

*Have you had any cool Washington, D.C. celebrity run-ins?*

Mark Warner goes to our Panera. So we see him occasionally. It’d be cool to run into [President Barack] Obama though.

*Are you reading any books for fun?*

I’m reading James Patterson’s, “Fourth of July.” I’m also like half-reading a lot of other books right now, too. I just finished “Naked” by David Sedaris; it’s a book of short-stories about his life. It’s told in a way where you learn something and then he casually mentions it in other stories, so you feel like there’s a thread. I bounce around a lot, but I have a list. There’s a shelf at my house I want to read.

*Any last comments?*

It was unexpected how much I liked it here. First semester was hard, but I met great people and friends for life, and though I think I’m ready to go, it will be sad to leave. I’ll definitely be coming back for alumni events and Homecoming.
__If he’s brushing elbows over bagels with Mark Warner in Washington, D.C., who knows what new celebrity run-ins, cooking skills and adventures this senior will accumulate during his time in Midtown Manhattan. Until then, you can find Matt hanging out on the terrace, dancing with his iPod or soaking up these oddly warm November days in Williamsburg.__

Stepping into the main room of the Meridian Coffeeshop was like stepping back in time — or at least out of Williamsburg. The emptiness, but for five chairs, two sofas and an oriental rug, was offset by the dusty, yet regal, curtains adorning the windows and the eclectic mix of artwork. My eyes were drawn from an old movie poster, to an alien painting, to a portrait of Elvis Presley, and finally to the daily specials of coffee, tea and face punches. And so, I ordered my first cup of coffee at the Meridian, or almost did. They happened to be out of coffee that Sunday evening, but I was invited back to the kitchen to check out the tea selection. Although this was nothing more than your grocery store assortment of bagged tea, I found charm in the way my simple coffeeshop stop had become an interactive venture.

“Most people don’t come here for the coffee and the tea,” Eric Tyler ’11 said. “They come because it’s very connected to a particular community.”

In fact “the folks,” as Web.wm.edu/so/meridian refers to the staff, seem to play a pivotal role in developing the Meridian’s unique character. The site describes Meridian regulars as “the elegant ones, those who have read the warnings, who pretend to know twelve-tone, who half-heartedly kill cockroaches, who found a past worth mentioning, who aren’t quite willing to starve … we [who] savor the simple expression of the complex thought.”

While the website jokes the Meridian “was originally built in 5000 B.C. during the Neolithic period in Mesopotamia,” it does have a history. “It’s a really cool place with a cool story and a nice culture behind it,” employee Matt Caterine ’12 said.

Hidden on the outskirts of campus, past Hunt Hall, in an inconspicuous aging white home, the Meridian fully embodies the meaning of a coffeehouse. As I sat in a large armchair with the stuffing popping out the side I felt more like I was in my grandmother’s living room than at a coffeehouse. The antique piano in the far corner of the room, dating back to 1925, only added to the aura of authenticity. A fan, missing one blade, dangled from the ceiling, and across the room a large bookshelf held a hodgepodge of CDs, board games, and markers — evidence of the Meridian’s multifaceted functions.

On Friday and Saturday evenings the Meridian hosts local musicians. On Nov. 20 The Invisible Hand, the Astronomers and the Vincent Price Tribute Band will be performing. Every Wednesday night they turn on the projectors for the screening of an original horror film, “creature features” as they are more affectionately called. The Meridian is student run and open every day from 7 p.m. to 12 a.m., yet according to customers Tuesday and Wednesday nights are the most popular. On quieter evenings, such as the Sunday night on which I stopped by, you can find students lounging atop the well-worn couch on the front porch or studying inside to the rich sounds of classical music.

As I paid for my tea, watching my money get stashed away in a ceramic vase rather than in the cash register, I couldn’t help but think how often this Williamsburg gem is overlooked. Although the Meridian does cater to a group outside the mainstream it is by no means exclusive. The sundry decor begs to be matched by an equally diverse group of people. With 50-cent coffee and an atypical atmosphere the Meridian can be an exciting step out of the mundane for any student at the College of William and Mary.

It’s a Thursday night as students at the College of William and Mary enter Aromas, the popular coffee shop on Prince George Street. Inside, a 16-year-old guitarist sings his way through the classics of The Beatles and Nirvana as his family and fans look on. The students drop their belongings at an available table and go to order biscotti and coffee at the counter. To a friendly observer, it is certainly a typical Open Mic Night.

“Do you know any Bob Dylan songs?” a student said to the guitarist.

The young guitarist did not know any Bob Dylan songs but began to play The Beatle’s “Across the Universe” instead. The students joined in singing.

But no matter if it is Open Mic Night or an average Monday morning, students can be found stopping by for a cup of espresso before classes or catching up on the latest coffeehouse news from the amiable baristas.

“Aromas is a great place to go on a cold day, or when you just really need a break from studying,” Katie Demeria ’13 said. “It’s even worth the trip when it’s freezing outside. The environment is really calming, and the drinks are amazing. I love to get chai tea from there, and they always play great music, like the ‘Across the Universe’ soundtrack.”

The pastries and drinks are certainly delicious. Throughout the day, patrons can order coffee treats, hot chocolate delights and sweet smoothies with muffins, scones and cakes of their choosing. Menu specials offer breakfast, lunch and dinner entrees.

“The nice thing about Aromas is, well, the lights are never too bright, the room is never too quiet, and the food and coffee are never anything but delicious,” Hillary May ’13 said. “I guess you’d call that atmosphere.”
But Aromas is not complete without the friendly ambiance — the Italian espresso posters, the local artist paintings, even photographs of Humphrey Bogart and Lauren Bacall above a stack of menus and newspapers. The business of a Saturday morning or the somber, yet accepting, mood of an Open Mic poetry reading heightens the experience.

“Unattended children will be given an espresso and a free puppy,” Cynthia Arzola ’13 said quoting an amusing sign in the coffee shop.

And so, the friendly observer continues to watch the singing unfold into applause. Poets, pianists and a Star Wars rapper take their turns at the microphone. Finally the Bob Dylan fan approaches the microphone just as a barista calls, “ten minutes until closing.” But even then, the espresso machines can still be heard in the background.

Walking into the Daily Grind, the overwhelming scent of coffee combines with lounge music and comfy chairs to give off the modern coffeehouse feel. The newest coffeehouse in Williamsburg on Duke of Gloucester Street, however, has a very different atmosphere.

At R. Charlton Coffeehouse — the first exhibition building in Colonial Williamsburg in 50 years — visitors tour the original building as if they were back in 1765. The coffeehouse will open on Nov. 20.

“We will begin by re-enacting the Stamp Act protest,” Communication Manger for Colonial Williamsburg Jim Bradley said. “George Mercer was there from England to collect, and he was met by this angry mob. Lucky for him, the royal governor was sitting on the porch of the coffeehouse.”

The royal governor at the time, Francis Fauquier, escorted Mercer to safety, and Mercer resigned from his post the next day. This historic event will kick off the opening ceremony by emphasizing the significance of the coffeehouse during the pre-Revolutionary Era.

“The coffeehouse was not just a coffeehouse,” Bradley said. “It was styled on English coffeehouses in the time that were very high-style eating and drinking establishments, as opposed to taverns.”

During the late 1760s the coffeehouse was the center for political discussion, business transactions and a forum to share news from England.

While the historical significance of the coffeehouse extends far beyond the serving of food and drinks, part of the interactive tour will include sampling the cuisine.

“During the interpretive experience, the guest will be introduced to taste and smell,” Bradley said. “You will be able to sample tea, coffee and chocolate — the tastes of the time.”

On Nov. 22, normal interactive tours of the Coffeehouse begin. The open houses on Friday, Saturday and Sunday will include samplings of old-fashioned beverages, although drinks and food are not available for purchase at the coffeehouse.

While other exhibitions in Colonial Williamsburg refer to history in the past tense, tours in the coffeehouse will be conducted as though visitors and living in the 18th century.

“When you enter the coffeehouse, you will be entered into 1766,” Bradley said. “It is an interactive plan that we haven’t tried before, but what we are trying to do is place the guest in that time and place.”

This new approach to historic interpretation will allow for guests to have a broader experience of what daily life was like during the colonial time period. Although knowledge of the coffeehouse has existed for many years, it was not until the Colonial Williamsburg Foundation received a $5 million donation from the Mars Foundation that reconstruction began.

“During the archaeological dig, we found about half a million archaeological pieces in the site which gave us information about what existed in the house,” Communications Manager for Colonial Williamsburg Barbara Brown said.

The coffeehouse is built on the original 18th century brick foundation. From that foundation, the house has been rebuilt to include authentic furnishings.

“Furnishing did not start until the third week of October,” Bradley said. “Now we are furnished, and interpretive training has been going on inside the building for a week or two in preparation for the grand opening this Friday.”

Friday’s opening is free to all visitors, and to students of the College of William and Mary with a student ID.
“[A] William and Mary ID functions just like a visitor’s pass, so come out and enjoy,” Bradley said.