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Nine simple ways to elude Valentine’s Day loneliness

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Valentine’s Day is sort of like sitting next to a stranger on a plane who won’t stop talking to you when there are ten empty seats but the stewardess won’t let you move. It’s annoying, but you have no choice but to suck it up and wait for it to be over. Sure, some of you might currently be dating the latest love of your life, but for those whose dating life is as unsuccessful as that of “Jersey Shore’s” Snooki, you might be bracing yourself for a lonely 24 hours. Don’t fret, here are some ideas on how you can actually enjoy your day without feeling sick from witnessing too much cutesy-wootsie behavior.

1. Run away — Take a flight from our quaint Williamsburg-Newport News airport as far as it will take you, which is probably not very far. Try to get to Mexico and drown your sorrows in margaritas with your new “friend” Francisco (or was it Roberto)? Either way, it’s bound to be a good time. But, if you are a poor struggling college student type, then this plan is not for you. Proceed to option two.

2. Run away (just not quite out of the country) — For those with less dinero, head to the units or the delis with your single friends. Be sophisticated and make rounds at all the most chic hotspots in town — the College Delly, Paul’s Deli, the Green Leafe Cafe — and then repeat. Remind yourself that, because you’re single, the following behaviors are still acceptable: drinking like it’s your 21st birthday, fist pumping excessively, and kissing the nearest attractive — or somewhat attractive — male or female.

3. Two words: Single Ladies — What better and more appropriate way to spend your time than filming your own version of Beyonce’s video. Don a black leotard — guys included — and perform your own rendition. Bask in the love of 100,000 anonymous YouTube hits after you post it.

4. Hoodoo Voodoo — The lyrics to Wilco’s song might not make much sense, but the band might have been onto something with the whole voodoo thing. At least that’s what the AMP Late Nite committee seems to think. Head out to AMP’s anti-Valentine’s Day party tomorrow at 9 p.m. in Lodge 1 and enjoy a summer camp-like atmosphere, complete with fun games (break-up bingo), arts and crafts (make your own voodoo dolls) and storytelling (anonymous tales about exes doing us wrong). As The Situation once wisely observed, “haterjuice is best served cold.” It’s clearly going to be an uplifting, feel-good kind of experience. All that’s missing is sitting around a campfire singing kumbay-you are lonely.

5. Creepy McCreepster — Who needs to be on “The Bachelor” or “The Bachelorette” when we have the wm.goodcrush.com service? It’s being offered by the Student Assembly and it involves a painfully simple process to locate your one true love: Log in, type in the e-mail of your crush, and they will get an email telling them they have an anonymous stalker, I mean, admirer. Then they type in the e-mail addresses of their crushes. If two mutual admirers match up, they both find out. It’s that simple.

6. Be in denial — Watch a movie or television show that a boyfriend or girlfriend would never want to watch. For ladies, go see “Valentine’s Day,” and guys, go see “Wolfman.” Guys should see something extra action filled or scary, something that girls hate — basically everything except for “The Notebook” or movies with Hugh Grant. Another option is to just play video games until you get carpal tunnel.

7. Mass textathon — Because nobody ever notices that it’s a mass text, right? Even though they might catch your insincerity, take the time to reconnect with family members, high school friends, etc. It will help you remember that having a significant other is not everything, just almost everything. At least it will knock off a few hours from the day.

8. GTL — Take care of the essentials: gym, tanning, laundry. Since nobody else will be paying extra attention to you, you can make up for it. Head to the Student Recreation Center and pump some iron at Body Pump. Maybe do some laundry, although this requires a lot of effort for the tired, single soul. As for tanning, nobody wants to date an Oompa Loompa — unless you’re Pauly D — so feel free to skip that one, too. But you can have a MySpace style photoshoot or write love poems — to yourself.

9. Reality check — Remind yourself that you are not the only single on campus. Band together with fellow singles, go out and have a good time. Let’s be honest, there are plenty of other whiny girls out there complaining about Valentine’s Day who would like some attention. (And you have to assume that there are guys who would like to meet said whiny girls.) The only prescription is more cowbell. No, actually it’s going out and meeting each other. Maybe you will make a friend, a special friend, or your future spouse — you never know. Also, feel free to crash any and all parties, because there might not be much else going on. While you’re out, be sure to carry a travel sized/airport security friendly voodoo doll in your pocket and wear sneakers in case you do decide to catch that flight to Cancun.

Don’t forget that you can actually have a decent, nay, tolerable day despite any strong aversions to love, the color red or cute stuffed animals. . Learn to embrace your single status and maybe you won’t have to read this column next year. Or maybe you will be writing it. Either way, make sure you say hello to the lone girl or girl at the bar in Mexico wearing black and folding laundry.

Road food ahead

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Every summer of my childhood and adolescence, my family has taken a roadtrip either northwest to Michigan, or southwest to Oklahoma. An important part of the road trip for us was always the hunt for roadside food. My mother has a sixth sense for it. She can spot a good diner at 60 mph. For one thing, she knows how to read a parking lot; a good mix of Cadillacs and pickup trucks are a clear indicator of legit grub. The rationale is that if good ole boys and retirees are both drawn to a restaurant, it’s worth checking out.

From these summers on the road, I have gained a serious respect for diners, burger joints, drive-ups, drive-ins — in short, every form of non-chain, inexpensive American food to be had within a few miles of the interstate. The food is important, of course; on the highway where gas station snacks and fast-food dominate finding real food is essential. A really good roadside joint is nourishing on another level too. It’s heartening just to see that it is still there as an option, open for business. Mom-and-pop restaurants are rarely built just off the highway anymore. They can’t compete with chain restaurants that provide a predictable restaurant experience to weary travelers unwilling to take chances on local restaurants they know nothing about. As a result, most local roadside food has been around for a while.

In the fast-changing landscape of roadside America, a gem like the 57-year-old Queen Anne Dari Snak stands out. Windows cluttered with local business cards, multi-colored fluorescents under a vaguely space-aged awning, and a walk-up design give it an air of history.

It stands only two miles from campus, about as far as New Town, yet it is widely unknown among students at the College. This is, in large part, because it is on Merrimac Trail. Before the interstate system was built, Merrimac Trail — also called Route 143 — was a section of the now defunct Route 168, which carried a lot of east-west traffic. Traffic was diverted away from the road once I-64 was completed.

This lack of traffic, and therefore lack of competition for real estate, is in part what has preserved the Queen Anne for so long. Even though the restaurant still stands, some changes have occurred. Monica Taylor, Queen Anne’s manager, has seen many of these changes. She grew up in York County and remembers when Route 143 was two lanes and heavily wooded.

“I didn’t even know this place was here,” Taylor said. “It was everyone’s best kept secret.”

Taylor said the building was one of the first few built during the area in the ’50s. Her husband Calvin set his sights on the Queen Anne at age 15. Frequently, he would visit and talk to then-owner Sofos Takis.

Over the years, the menu has seen surprisingly few changes.

“We’ve got the same barbecue, the same footlongs, the same chili recipe,” Monica said. “It’s been mounted over there on the wall for I don’t know how long.”

Occasionally new items are added. Green beans and mac and cheese used to be offered, and now they’ve added zucchini — but the Quenne Anne is, for the most part, as it has always been. Monica explained that regular customers often request things that aren’t even on the menu.

“We still get people in here in their 60s who have been coming here since they were five years old,” Monica said. “Everyone’s got their favorite. If they can explain it to me and we’ve got the ingredients, I’ll always try to accommodate.”

The Queen Anne also puts up ads for local businesses and churches, sponsors little league baseball, and has given generations of Williamsburg kids their first summer jobs. Monica keeps the menu simple and inexpensive to keep it family-oriented.

“When I bought this place I was raising a family of five,” she said. “Do you know how hard it is to raise a family of five? Hard. So, I try to keep meals under five dollars.”

The food is simple, but unique, and it keeps people coming back.

“I don’t know what it is,” Monica said. “It’s something about this old building.”

No matter what building it was housed in, the food is the main attraction for any customer. When faced with a menu as extensive as the Queen Anne Dari Snak’s, it can be difficult to know where to start. There are a few items that are great indicators of overall quality at any barbecue or hamburger joint: coleslaw and potato salad. If a restaurant is cutting corners, the first thing to go can be these simple salads that are easily bought in bulk. Queen Anne, however, does not disappoint. The coleslaw has color, tang and sizeable pieces of carrot and cabbage — and not like the cabbage bits in mayonnaise that get served at some lesser establishments. Their potato salad is well balanced, no-frills and homemade — just as they proudly advertise on the menu.

Their hamburgers are absolutely satisfying. I’ll upset everyone and say that the burgers are better all-around than a Five Guys burger. The burger is a solid, hand-formed patty on a bun toasted on the flat top — plus toppings. On top of that, a junior burger, which is big enough, costs $1.75, and you can get a jumbo for just one dollar more.

I haven’t eaten anything on the menu that disappoints. The fried oyster sandwich is excellent, the onion rings are top notch and there is a variety of milkshakes and sundaes.

Beyond the food, the Queen Anne is also a significant piece of the city’s culture.

“The Queen Anne Dari Snak brings us back to an emotional sense of why we belong here, and food is one of the few things that can do that,” Bobby Moeller ’10 said. “It’s a hearty meal, it’s dank, but it’s also full of love.”

The emphasis on Williamsburg’s colonial history as the center of the community denies, to some extent, the continuing story of the city.

“Especially for Williamsburg, I think there’s a huge divide between the students and the town, and you can see it in our attitudes,” Moeller said. “It helps us see the town as something bigger than us and our reason for being here, and grounds us in Williamsburg as a place. Because after four years we could leave only remembering the school, but going to places like the Queen Anne Dari Snak really grounds our memories more firmly.”

The small building that Monica and her husband have known since childhood still holds recipes and memories from more than half a century ago.

“It’s my baby,” she said. “If you love a business, you do what you can for it. And I do love it.”

Look outside the state

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This week, the General Assembly did us a good turn — well, they did not do us a bad one — in tabling a frivolous, misconceived bill that would have increased the ratio of in- to out-of-state students in Virginia universities. Now, it’s time for the GA to go one step further: If Richmond continues to underfund us, then it must give us greater freedom to bring in more students from out of state — and their desperately needed money.

We’ve called for this change before, and it remains the right thing to do. Currently, because of disparate tuition rates, two-thirds of the College of William and Mary’s tuition revenue comes from one third of its student body: the out-of-state students. Every percentage point in their direction means thousands more much-needed dollars for the College at no additional cost.

We doubt the GA will be eager to make such a switch, but it seems the only fair thing to do. State support for the College has plummeted over the last two decades, such that the College is now paying the majority of its own day-to-day bills. And yet, the state has given up very little control throughout the same period, leaving the school with very few options when money is short. This will be politically difficult, yes, but for a higher education system that aspires to excellence, some painful politicking is preferable to a gradual decline in standards.

And students from other states offer the state more than just dollars. While other states experience a brain drain, the commonwealth can look forward to the brain gain that results when talented out-of-staters opt to settle here after graduation. Virginia can increase its base of well-educated community leaders and business owners while easily and cheaply preserving the top-tier character of its universities. Sounds pretty good to us.

CAP advises table ban and other insights

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The Fraternity and Sorority Coalition Assessment Project released an overview on the status of Greek organizations at the College of William and Mary. Their report listed what they perceived to be strengths and weaknesses of our Greek system. They named the usual pros: higher graduation rates among Greeks, lower levels of stress, and members who are active outside their chapters. The problems the coalition highlighted were equally banal, including alcohol use and abuse, hazing concerns and housing issues. For the most part their assessment was accurate, but some of their policy recommendations are ill-informed.

The report states that while there is clearly a special relationship between the college administration and the fraternity and sorority community, there is no codified official recognition. This means the administration and Greek organizations can never have a clearly delineated relationship. The end result is an uncertainty in their interactions and differing policies among Residence Life, Student Affairs and the Campus Police.

The report then suggests that the College should develop an explicit relationship with fraternities and sororities to make clear their rights and responsibilities. It is easy to imagine this happening: Greek leaders would have long talks with the administration and draw up guidelines for their organizations. It would all look good on paper, but in the end, it would be completely meaningless. The administration could never have an official Greek policy that actually addressed the major point of contention between the two groups, alcohol use.

National law prohibits the College from condoning any use of alcohol by students under 21. It would have to be official policy to enforce this law, and most Greek organizations — although they might give lip service to such an agreement — would never abide by it. This would leave the Greek relationship with the administration in much the same state it already is.

Personally, I believe that the current equilibrium is manageable. The administration — although officially bound to enforce the law — realizes unofficially that it is often violated. Granted, this does lead to a high degree of subjectivity and uncertainty when administration personnel and Greek social life collide, but this amorphousness is a sort of compromise between the two groups. It has thus far proved a workable status quo.

The coalition has its own ideas on how to reform alcohol policy. Disturbed by the alcohol use in the
fraternity complex, they recommend the College create a space in which all student groups can host social events with alcohol. This place should have “a third-party vendor and cash bar with age verification, and they must not serve alcohol to members or guests who are under the legal drinking age.” I believe we have a few of these already — they are called delis. As much as I would applaud an on-campus bar, I fail to see how this would reduce social drinking in the units.

An equally useful idea put forth by the coalition was a ban on beer pong tables. Given that a beer pong table is basically any table on which you play beer pong, enforcement of such a policy might be a challenge (plus, it would be a shame now that pong balls are subsidized by the Student Assembly).

Putting misguided policy prescriptions aside, the coalition’s report is a decent, although not perfect, outline of the state of Greek affairs on our campus, and I encourage you all to read it.

Click here to download a PDF copy of the full report.

Email Ed Innace at einnace@wm.edu.

Plastic bag tax as disposable as what it attempts to reduce

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A subcommittee of the Virginia House Finance Committee is currently considering Del. Adam Ebbin’s (D-Arlington) House Bill 1115, which would tax the use of non-reusable plastic and paper shopping bags. At first glance this bill seems like a positive movement.

This tax would charge $0.05 for every non-reusable shopping bag used with the money raised directed toward the Virginia Water Quality Improvement Fund. It is good to see an initiative toward a greener lifestyle. Even better, I thought, the raised money will go directly to helping the people of Virginia. After reading through the seemingly well thought out exceptions to the tax due to issues of practicality, the bill was even more encouraging.

Upon re-reading this bill, however, several unnerving points became more obvious. First, stores are entitled to one cent of the five-cent tax and two cents if they establish a bag-credit customer program. Furthermore, the bill stipulates a monetary penalty of up to $1,000 for companies that do not collect the taxes. If this bill seems well-intentioned, but something is still bugging you about it, then you, too, have noticed that there is something rotten in the commonwealth of Virginia.

Another issue is that the tax falls squarely onto the consumers’ shoulders. In addition, the bill does not even stipulate a provision for affordable and conveniently obtainable reusable bags. Hence, unless consumers bring reusable bags that they have purchased from elsewhere, companies may be able to force the use of plastic bags and enjoy their one- or two-cent cut. The companies will profit directly from these taxes, and as history has shown, any environment in which profits arise from taxation of the people is ripe for corruption.

Lastly, the rhetoric used shows that the intention of the bill is to cut the use of non-reusable bags; however, in Ebbin’s summation of the bill, he states that the tax would apply to “tangible personal property carried out of the place of purchase.” This means that this bill would not only affect grocery shopping — it would apply to all forms of tangible commodities. Aside from the handful of exceptions, everything from hardware and electronics to floral arrangements, frozen goods and even clothes would be taxed for the use of non-reusable bags. And yes, those monstrous plastic bags from Toys-R-Us during the Christmas shopping season will also be taxed, so be prepared if your family is planning on buying Rock Band for the Wii next holiday season.

Overall, this bill is well-intentioned, but it is clouded and made dangerous by nebulous wording and lack of proper concern for details. Frankly, this bill seems as if it had been drafted by high school freshmen at Model Congress. It may be more prudent for the House to install a reward system for those consumers who do use reusable shopping bags. The downside to that proposition would be that there would be no funds available to be sent to the Virginia Water Quality Improvement Fund.

It is critical, however, that we understand that the weight of this tax will be harnessed solely on middle- to low-class consumers. The upper class either not feel the weight or will not be taxed, since they are more likely to shop at expensive grocery stores like Whole Foods where re-usable shopping bags are already a highly available and regularly used option.

Thus, one is left with two possibilities: either the authors of the bill are naive and careless or they are purposely creating a huge loophole to allow illegitimate fundraising for the Virginia Water Quality Improvement Fund. Sometimes, the best of intentions go awry.

Email Aristotle Herbert at amherbert@wm.edu.

Football: Tracy, Lissemore feature in collegiate all-star game

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Most college football seniors are now finished with their football careers, but that is not the case for William and Mary All-Americans defensive end Adrian Tracy and defensive tackle Sean Lissemore, who competed this past Saturday in the Texas vs. The Nation All-Star Game in El Paso, Tex. Tracy was part of the Nation’s team, while Lissemore was added to Texas’s roster as a replacement about a week before the game.

“I got lucky a guy couldn’t make it, and I took his position and just made the best of the situation,” Lissemore said.

Some of the best players from all around the country were invited to come and prove themselves. Lissemore lined up next to players from SEC powerhouses Alabama and LSU, while Tracy played alongside players from schools like Oregon and Cincinnati.

“It’s a little bit of an intimidating factor because everyone puts them up on a pedestal, but then you start playing with these guys, and you realize that you’re on the same level, if not better than them,” Lissemore said.

In a key chance to impress NFL scouts, both Tribe stars represented themselves and their school very well. Tracy was featured at outside linebacker on the Nation’s team, the spot at which he will likely be deployed in the NFL. Lissemore helped lead the Texas team to a 36-17 win, posting four tackles, including a sack for a safety.

“In a normal game at William and Mary, I would have been pretty satisfied with those results,” Lissemore said. “And I feel like I really stepped up to the challenge and showed that I can play.”
With his performance Saturday, Lissemore thinks that he certainly boosted his draft stock. Both he and Tracy are projected to go as high as the 4th round of the NFL draft; 93 percent of the All-Star game’s 2009 roster (111 out of 119 players) went on to sign NFL contracts.

Tracy graduated from the College this past semester and is currently living and training in Miami, Fla. Lissemore continues to balance his class schedule with training four to five times a week with former Tribe teammates safety David Caldwell and wide receiver D.J. McCauley. The trio are preparing at Elkin Sports Performance in Richmond, the location that helped cornerback Derek Cox ’09 emerge as a third-round NFL draft pick last April.

GA finally shows semblance of sanity and tables in-state student bill

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_Click image to enlarge._

Lacrosse: 2010 season preview

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Familiarity has not necessarily been a benefit to the College in recent seasons. Two years in a row, the squad has seen its NCAA tournament hopes come to an end on its own Albert-Daly Field, falling short in successive CAA tournaments that it hosted as the conference’s top seed.

This season, no. 20 William and Mary believes that it can finally clear that hurdle — emerge from the CAA postseason intact and catapult itself into the NCAA tournament.

The College returns nine starters and all six of its leading scorers from a team that captured a CAA regular season title last spring. This year, the Tribe will attempt to utilize its depth and experience to navigate a challenging nonconference schedule and reach the next level of postseason play.

“We are looking to improve on the last two seasons,” Head Coach Christine Halfpenny said. “We are really excited. We think we have a schedule that gives us a lot of opportunities to prove to ourselves that we can compete in the top 20 consistently game by game. I’m really excited; obviously we return a ton of [players] but I like the depth that we have. Starting with all of our returners and going all the way to our freshmen, we have a lot to choose from.”

Offensively, the College will look to follow up the successes of a 2009 squad that set program records in goals and points. The Tribe will be led by junior attacker Ashley Holofcener, a preseason All-CAA honoree and All-American candidate. Holofcener was the College’s leading scorer last season, amassing 64 points on 34 goals and 30 assists.

The Tribe will also feature a strong, athletic defense led by junior Sarah Jonson. A 2009 All-American, Jonson ranked sixth nationally and first in the CAA in caused turnovers. For the third straight year, the backline will be anchored by junior goalkeeper Emily Geary, who will attempt to continue to her superb work between the pipes.

Although the College boasts both a high-scoring attack and a solid defense, the core of the team lies in the midfield, which is headlined by junior Grace Golden. A 2009 All-CAA selection, Golden believes that this year’s squad has a chance to accomplish something special.

“First and foremost, we want to win the CAA tournament,” Golden said. “To win two straight CAA regular season titles, and then not win the tournament is kind of disappointing. So this year we want to win the CAA tournament and then go deep in the NCAA tournament.”

To facilitate that goal, Halfpenny has arranged a brutally difficult schedule this spring. The College will open against no. 16 Ohio State this Sunday at Busch Field at 1 p.m. Then, matchups against no. 5 Duke and no. 8 Virginia loom over the following three games. No. 17 Towson and no. 19 James Madison will await in CAA play.

Key contributor: Grace Golden

In order for the Tribe to finally progress into the NCAA tournament, junior midfielder Grace Golden will need to be on top of her game. Luckily for her teammates, Golden’s game is quite formidable. Last season, the junior established herself as one of the nation’s top midfielders, leading the Tribe with 44 goals, good for 2.6 per game. Golden’s list of accolades is lengthy; she was named a Tewaaraton Trophy Watch List honoree , a 2009 All-South Region Second Team selection, and a 2010 All-CAA Preseason nominee. And her success is critical to the Tribe’s chances. In 2009, Golden scored in all but five of the College’s matches, making 52 percent of her shots from the field.

But an equally important contribution lies in Golden’s leadership of a deep Tribe midfield.

“We are bringing back a lot of speed, and we are definitely utilizing it in the midfield, and looking for each other more,” Golden said. “Additionally, on defense we are planning on shutting people down and working together as a team, just like we did last year.”

Men’s basketball: Hot-shooting Tribe too much for Delaware

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After a seemingly endless string of tight games, the Tribe returned home to Kaplan Arena Wednesday in search of a comfortable win over a squad in the bottom half of the CAA standings. Against a tired Delaware squad playing on just one day of rest, the College (17-7, 9-5 CAA) got just that, pounding out an efficient 67-54 victory that built vital momentum heading into Saturday’s showdown with first-place Northeastern.

“It was a gutsy performance tonight,” Head Coach Tony Shaver said. “We had two or three guys with a pretty serious case of the flue, and it was tough for them to play as well as they did. It was a good, tough conference win.”

The victory was the College’s third in its past four games and its first by multiple possessions since a Jan. 16 win over Hofstra.

The Tribe was able to return to the formula that had spurred it to a 14-2 start to the season, relying on hot shooting and balanced scoring to finish off a season sweep of the Blue Hens (7-18, 3-11 CAA).

Nine of the squad’s 10 rotation players tallied points, while the College shot 51% from the floor and 47% from three-point range.

“Our practices Monday and Tuesday were really two of the best we’ve had in about a month,” Shaver said. “You could sense some good things happening.”

Sophomore guard Quinn McDowell was particularly efficient, knocking down all six of his shots for 11 points, while junior center Marcus Kitts and senior guard David Schneider accounted for 29 points on 9 of 20 shooting between them.

“A lot of guys had great nights tonight,” Schneider said. “We just need that balanced scoring that we had earlier in the season.”

The College came out hot, opening up a 30-14 lead with 4:12 remaining in the first half. After playing UNC-Wilmington Monday due to a snow postponement, Delaware was clearly a step slow, getting into foul trouble early, and missing 24 of their first 29 shots.

But the Blue Hens clawed back, hitting their last six shots of the half to embark on a 15-3 run and cut the lead to 32-29 entering the break.

“They really rely on their guards, so they can easily get out of a hole,” Schneider said. “It’s hard to limit them, especially when they get going.”

After the intermission, Shaver dialed up a three-point play which saw Schneider bury a deep three, before senior guard Sean McCurdy answered with a trey of his own. The lead immediately swelled to nine points, and it would never drop below three the rest of the evening.

“That’s probably the best start we’ve had coming out of a half,” Schneider said. “That pretty much sealed the deal the rest of the half. It sent a message to our team.”

Delaware cut the deficit to 53-50 with 6:38 remaining, but a pair of free throws from Schneider sparked the College to a 9-0 run that would ice the game.

Coupled with a Hofstra win over Drexel and George Mason’s Tuesday win over Virginia Commonwealth, the win returned the Tribe to fourth place in the conference, temporarily in position to receive the final CAA tournament bye.

It also saw the College break out of its lengthy shooting slump just in time for matchups against first-place Northeastern and second-place George Mason in the week ahead.

“We have to come out with the same aggression that we had tonight,” Schneider said “This win should give us a lot of confidence.”

For a final box score, click here.

Men’s basketball: Tribe vs. Delaware live blog

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The Flat Hat is live, courtside at Kaplan Arena. as the College (17-7, 8-5 CAA) takes on the Blue Hens (7-17, 3-10 CAA). Tune in for play-by-play, commentary, analysis, and more.

Chime in below with comments or questions in addition to the live commentary.

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