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Adding Tobasco to spice up the new year

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Happy New Year and welcome back. Hopefully your break was excellent and you took that time to shatter some of those great resolutions pledged while drinking champagne.

p. Or maybe went on another terrible blind date set up by your Aunt Linda, fell back in love with that crush back home who is so wrong for you or somehow ended up on the couch of that almost-legal kid again.

p. As some of you may have noticed, the ’Burg decided to greet us in its own way: with the icy slap of actual winter. But don’t despair; there is more than one way to warm up in the drafty dorms.

Some of these winter activities can be fun alone, but most are best enjoyed with a friend — or a group of friends if that’s your thing. Any one of them should be able to take the chills out of your bones and fog up the windows.

p. Speaking of steamy things to do, showering with a partner never gets old. Hopefully, the showers in your building give you enough hot water to get two people hot and wet, so then you can have some private time in your winter water wonderland. If you’re lucky enough to live in a dorm or apartment with a tub, this could become your favorite getaway. Warm each other up with your hands while the tub fills and then take the action into the world of bubbles. Remember to have protection handy just in case you end up turning up the temperature even more. No one wants to leave the warmth of a bath to brave the cold tile and retrieve a condom from the nightstand.

p. If you’re stuck with scrubbing each other down in a shower, don’t forget that the winter is the worst time for injuries. It may seem hilarious now, and I’m sure it might make forr a funny story later on, but slipping out of the shower during sex will probably hurt more than your pride. It’s also hard to get some lovin’ with a big cast on your foot.

p. Because it’s the first couple days of classes, there’s not too much in the way of work for most of us. I’m not suggesting to neglect your work to spend all day indulging your sexual desires, but why punish yourself by going to Swem for five hours? The whole time in class you’re dreaming of those warm blankets on your bed anyway, so why not hop back in for the afternoon? You can have a little party by yourself to heat up while your roommate’s out, or bring someone with you to snuggle. There’s nothing like an undercover cuddle on a blustery day, and you could turn it into a movie in bed. The best part is that you can always choose to ignore the action on the screen and start some of your own.

p. All you need for the next activity is a deck of cards. Strip poker is a classic, and when played to the extreme it can end very well for both players. If poker isn’t quite your style, there are plenty of other games, which can be updated for those with an exhibitionist streak. Most dorms have a duty office in the basement, or else there is that one guy in every hall who will loan out his Jenga set. Simply play the game normally, but place little bets along the way. “If I win this game of tic-tac-toe you’ve got to hand over those boxers” or “Bet you your bra that I can beat ‘Pscyhobilly Freakout’ on hard next time.” Stripping is always a great idea, and you’d be surprised how hot you can get by taking your clothes off.

p. Cooking is a favorite way to warm up from the inside out. Instead of using traditional hot chocolate, why not try cranking up the heat a bit higher. Add some cayenne or Tabasco sauce to a meal and feel the warmth fire up your mouth and get the blood pumping elsewhere.

p. Chili peppers may be a bit hot for some, but they are great to increase your body temperature just enough that you begin to sweat slightly and increase your blood flow. Underarm sweat in men contains androstadienone, a sex pheromone that supposedly acts upon members of the opposite sex to increase attraction. With the color rushing to your faces and that glisten of sweat, it’s easy to start imagining each other being sweaty and naked together. I only ask that you put away the food before it comes to that; the ants are inside looking for warm places, too.

p. __Emily Powell is the Flat Hat sex columnist. She enjoys playing strip Quidditch.__

Philosophers battle administration

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Philosophy professors Paul Davies and George Harris don’t look like rabble-rousers or schismatics. Harris, with his long haircut and thick moustache, seems like a younger L.Q. Jones, and Davies’ relaxed personality and good-natured chuckling puts one at ease.

p. But these two professors have been bees in the administration’s bonnet since last summer, when a report from an external review team alleged that senior faculty mistreated women and junior faculty, triggering Dean of Arts and Sciences Carl Strikwerda to remove Noah Lemos as the philosophy chair and replace him with an English professor.

p. Davies and Harris said that the administration, through the report and subsequent actions, has led a “smear campaign” against them and others in the department. While the report was vague and the accusations anonymous, the two professors said they felt it implicated them and others.

p. “I suspect on campus if you went around and asked people in other departments, they’d know we were targeted [in the report],” Harris said.

p. Davies and Harris feel that the review team, made up of four scholars from across the country, conducted the review questionably.

p. “Whatever procedures they used for gathering information, they’re not procedures that any institution, upon reflection, would endorse,” Davies said. “They were completely one-sided. There was no attempt to be complete in gathering information. There was no attempt to be balanced or fair.”

p. The team spent two days on campus, meeting with the whole department, including Davies and Harris, as well as in private sessions. It was in these private sessions, the two say, that accusations of misconduct were made, disregarding College rules governing grievances.

p. The College’s guidelines for external reviews state that the report should have been released along with a departmental response and a report from the dean. Strikwerda, however, released the external team’s report without a departmental response, or even alerting professors to the contents, which upset Davies and Harris.

p. “You take away even one of [the sections], let alone two, you’ve given up any attempt to produce a report that is of any use to the institution,” Davies said. “It was hijacked for some other purpose.”

p. Strikwerda has previously defended his actions by stating that he believed the threat outlined in the report was dire enough to merit immediate action.

p. “Like the rest of the faculty, academic administrators are very concerned that the College continues to be seen as the strong intellectual center that we believe it is,” he said.

p. Davies and Harris, however, doubt this claim and were surprised by the dean’s response time and distressed by his attitude.

p. “It took the dean three weeks to send us a memo saying, ‘Oops. I now have information that shows there isn’t an issue about the environment for women or for students,’” Davies said. “Three weeks.”

p. From that point on, Davies and Harris refused to cooperate because of the procedural violation. Harris said they have since become isolated from the administration and their colleagues.

p. Feiss stressed that the two professors have not done wrong.
“They have raised issues that they believe are substantive. I disagree,” he said. “Disagreement and challenge of authority contribute to the strength and vitality of the academy.”

p. The two said that they are not clear on why the administration acted like it did. Although they do not think it is political, they believe that the administration is not acting properly. They argue that a culture has arisen in the administration that places the College’s image above all else.

p. “There’s some culture here at the College that’s in a fever pitch about — well, here’s a very important thing — protecting women against assault on campus,” Harris said.

p. He and Davies charge that the culture extends beyond Strikwerda.

p. “The problems started with the dean, but we’re not focusing just on the dean; we think it’s the dean, the provost [Geoffrey Feiss], the president [Gene Nichol],” Davies said. “And, we also have problems with our colleagues.”

p. He added that appeals to the Faculty Hearing Committee were deflected. Davies also said that they had met three times with Nichol, and each time he supported the actions of Strikwerda.

p. Davies believes that the administration is opaque, preventing inquiries into its actions and protecting it from oversight.

p. “You can’t have accountability with such insularity,” Davies said, adding that “there is an arrogance that they know what’s best for everybody.”

p. Harris agreed.

p. “If a university is not insular enough, then there will be micromanagement, and usually in this country what happens is the right has too much influence on what goes on. If it becomes too insular, given the history of this country, then it becomes too influenced by the left,” Harris said. “So what do I think? I think there’s a bit of Big Brother about it. It’s not a simple matter. And we need to break that culture, and I don’t know how to do it, except this. We do know this: we’re not taking this.”
Feiss disputed the Orwellian charge.

p. “This is not true,” he said. “My office nor the president’s has any oversight over an academic department in the operational sense. The dean has clearly specified responsibilities and exercises those in accordance with established procedures and in consultation with the Faculty Affairs Committee … and the Dean’s Advisory Committee.”

p. Davies and Harris are uncertain of their futures. Harris, who recently renounced his title of Chancellor Professor of Philosophy, is on research leave this semester. Davies is teaching this semester but is on leave next year. Neither is sure if they will continue teaching at the College.

p. Feiss and Strikwerda both said that the two are faculty members in good standing, although Davies and Harris said they feel isolated and threatened.

p. “The fact of the matter is we may just be ruined here,” Harris said. “If we are, it’s a disgrace to this community, not us.”
Nichol declined to comment.

Investigation exposes British univeristy scam

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__BBC London finds Irish International University to be a false institution__

The Irish International University, which offers foreign students the opportunity to study in London, was exposed as a scam by a BBC London investigation that aired Jan. 7, 2008.

p. The organization was found to be unaccredited and illegally using the designation of “university.” At the time of the investigation, over 5,000 students were reported to have obtained educational visas to enter Britain and take IIU courses and examinations at various private colleges around London.

p. IIU Executive President, Professor Hardeep Singh Sandu, claimed the program was accredited through the Quality Assurance Commission, an institution he described as an “independent body” maintaining the quality of education in the United Kingdom. However, further investigation revealed that the QAC was actually a virtual office owned by Sandhu himself.

p. Additionally, it was revealed that another unaccredited university in the Caribbean had awarded Sandhu’s doctorate degree, a Doctor of Letters.

p. Professor John Arnold of Loughborough University examined IIU coursework from a graduate of the institution.

p. “Students are paying for what I would regard as worthless and bogus qualifications,” he said. “You know, I really think that they’ll probably be getting qualifications which are unlikely to be taken seriously, at least in Western Europe.”

p. The deception was maintained largely through the sucess of a misleading website. The site provides large amounts of false information, including the existence of a Dublin campus. Upon visiting the address, BBC investigators found only a mailbox.
Jeffrey Wooller, a wealthy British accountant, serves as Honorary Chancellor of the university. In an interview with an undercover actor for the BBC posing as an academic, Wooller said that the IIU was not “recognized anywhere.”

p. Wooller refused to quit as Honorary Chancellor, stating that most IIU students were happy and that the university’s programs were a good value.

p. In addition to false program details, the website pictured IIU award ceremonies conducted at venerable institutions such as Cambridge and Oxford Universities.

p. “If you can mention Oxford [and] Cambridge, then the whole world thinks that it must be a good university,” Wooller said.
Following the BBC report, Cambridge and Oxford banned further use of their facilities for award ceremonies conducted by the IIU, and the IIU website was shut down.

This Week in Flat Hat History (Jan. 18)

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**1932**
The schedule for the men’s varsity debate team pitted them against the likes of the University of California at Berkley, Boston College and Harvard University. In a contest against UC Berkley, the College debated whether Hoover should be reelected in 1932.

p. **1968**
The new class attendance regulations, which stated that students had to attend all classes but did not specifically state how many could be validly missed, resulted in no radical change in the overall grade point average of students at the College.

p. **1970**
College catalogues and IBM place cards did little to alleviate the pain of registration as the year was marked with a registration period that was “worse than most” for students. Students reported problems such as being told false reasons for being rejected and not being able to register despite having pre-registered for the class.

p. **1984**
Due to budget constraints, the College announced the suspension of six varsity sports. The athletic directors announced that men’s lacrosse, fencing, swimming and riflery, along with women’s golf and fencing, would be discontinued for the next two years.

The College ranked fourth-best value by Kiplinger’s

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The College neared the top of the rankings published in February’s issue of Kiplinger’s Personal Finance Magazine when it placed fourth in the magazine’s annual report of the 100 best values in public colleges.

p. To compile the rankings, data was collected from over 500 American public, four-year institutions. The report takes into account both academic quality— using information like admission and graduation rates, student-faculty ratios and SAT scores — and economic value by evaluating total costs and financial aid availability.

p. The University of North Carolina at Chapel Hill topped the list, while the University of Virginia ranked third. Last year, the College ranked third on the list and in 2006, it was fourth.

Environmental Science Dept. receives $1.5 million grant

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The College’s Environmental Science and Policy program received a $1.5 million grant from the Andrew W. Mellon Foundation. The money will be used for the establishment of both a Center for Geospatial Analysis and a postdoctoral program in the interdisciplinary environmental science program.

p. Part of the grant money will be used to staff the Center for Geospatial Analysis. The center will be one of the country’s first at a liberal arts institution of the College’s size.

p. $800,000 of the endowment will be used to benefit the the post-doctoral program at the College. An additional $1.6 million will be raised to complete the endowment.

By the Numbers (Jan. 18)

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**6 inches**
The average annual snowfall in Williamsburg.

p. **100 percent**
The percentage of children who said they did not like clowns, according to a survey of 250 four to 16 year-olds by researchers at the University of Sheffield in England.

p. **2 hours**
The amount of time it takes for “yellow crazy ants” to kill a crab by squirting acid at it. The ants were imported to Christmas Island a century ago and have recently halved the population of bright red crabs, threatening the species with extinction.

p. **7 percent**
The proportion of body heat lost through one’s head, which contradicts the often-heard myth that 75 percent of body heat is lost in that manner.

Tribe comes from behind yet again

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p. For the third time in as many games, the Tribe can be called comeback kids.

p. With 1:26 remaining and the Tribe (8-8, 4-2) trailing 53-52, junior forward Chris Darnell rose for a short jumper in the lane, buried it and was fouled by Northeastern University’s Matt Janning: Darnell sank the free throw to extend the College’s first lead of the game at 55-53 and secure a fourth-straight CAA victory for the Tribe.

p. This string of CAA wins matches a four-game streak the College completed during the 1997-1998 season. The win also marked the third consecutive contest in which the Tribe rallied from a double-digit deficit.

p. “I told the team before the game [that] I just as soon not have a great comeback, but I’ll take it if it happens,” Head Coach Tony Shaver said.

p. The College found itself trailing by double figures for the third consecutive CAA contest, and much like its last two victories over Georgia State University and James Madison University, the Tribe played with confidence and energy to overcome the deficits.
Down 12 points at halftime, the College started the second half on a 14-4 run to cut the margin to two on a Darnell three-pointer. The Tribe sliced the deficit to one on four different occasions and tied the game at 47-47 when Darnell followed his own miss with a put-back. Just 42 seconds earlier, Darnell missed two free throws that could have knotted the game at 47, but Darnell responded with his put-back and the game-winning three-point play.

p. “I just tried to let the game come to me,” Darnell said. “I felt like I was due for a good game one of these days. It just so happened to be today.”

p. Darnell led the College with 12 points, 10 of which came in the second half. Junior forward Pete Stein and sophomore guard David Schneider each chipped in 10 points to spur the Tribe offense to a 33-point second half.

p. During the second half, the College shot 50 percent from the floor and committed only two turnovers, while the Huskies’ field goal percentage dropped from 53.6 to 40. The Tribe’s defense forced Northeastern into nine second-half turnovers, and senior guard Nathan Mann held the 2007 CAA Rookie of the Year Janning to zero second-half points.

p. Mann forced a turnover by deflecting Janning’s pass, then dribbled out the game’s final 4.6 seconds to ensure victory.
After the first half, a win seemed unlikely for the Tribe as the Huskies took a 12-point lead into the locker room.

p. “I thought the first half we took punches. We took one punch after another from them and didn’t respond,” Shaver said. “And I thought the second half we were terrific. Defensively, we were terrific. And our shot selection went from atrocious to good.

p. “So if we could learn to be consistent, it could be exciting.”

Staff Editorial: Work of Logo Committee must continue without Sadler

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p. Many students are justifiably upset with the College’s feeble attempt at a redesigned logo. While we, too, wish that a more inspired logo had been devised, it appears that we are now committed to the logo because of agreements with merchandisers. To mitigate the situation, the committee should continue to meet to develop a mascot as a part of the logo to improve its design.

p. While we wish Vice President Sadler a speedy recovery, Athletic Director Terry Driscoll should step up to lead the committee in his absence. For the mascot, the committee would be wise to allow students to vote on a variety of options in order to avoid the problems that met the unveiling of the logo. For students concerned with the image of the College, this is a task that cannot wait two months to reach a resolution.

Staff Editorial: Money for ‘Sex’ show warranted

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The Student Assembly finance committee should be commended for approving funding for the Sex Workers’ Art Show. While we do not necessarily endorse the content of the show, denying funding would effectively stifle free expression, which we believe must be strongly defended. The historically well-attended event will bring important discussion to campus.