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Register a voter, get $10

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p. Get a student to register to vote in Williamsburg and receive $10.

p. That’s the gist of the Williamsburg Civic Engagement Act, which earmarks $15,000 to pay for the registrations and was passed by the Student Assembly last Tuesday. So far, 108 students have signed up for training to register other students.

p. Williamsburg officials voiced concerns.

p. “It is highly unusual to pay people for the number of individuals that they persuade to register to vote,” Mayor Jeanne Zeidler said. “In [the] past, people have been encouraged to register and to vote out of political belief and/or conviction, not as a business opportunity for others.”

p. “The potential for abuse is present in this proposed procedure,” she added. “I question whether it is ethical and fear that it might undermine the democratic process.”

p. But student senators say the bill is necessary to ensure that students are fairly represented and that paying to register select voter groups is not a new concept.

p. “[This] is not only legal and ethical, but also crucial,” Sen. Walter McClean ’09, who sponsored the bill along with Senate Chair Matt Beato ’09, said.

p. “There are many private grants available for registering political minorities of all types.”

p. SA President Zach Pilchen ’09 said that there were many safeguards against abuse, including the provision that nobody affiliated with the SA would be eligible to receive payment for registering voters.

p. “We are absolutely not paying people to vote,” Pilchen said. “People cannot be paid for registering themselves. If we find out that there have been any moneymaking schemes, where people say, ‘you get $3 to register to vote, and I’ll keep $7,’ that person is not only going to not get any money, but they know they are going to be honor counciled.”

p. Pilchen also said that the SA is going to widely publicize the offer so that everyone in the student body would have equal opportunity to participate.

p. Government professor John Gilmour said that there could be a problem if mandatory student fees were involved.

p. “A student might reasonably ask why their fees should be going to fund a political campaign,” Gilmour wrote in an e-mail. “It is not for a particular candidate. But it is still very political. And why should bounties be needed? If students want to vote, they can register entirely on their own.”

p. Pilchen said that none of the $15,000 would come from mandatory student fees. It will instead come from money that the SA has raised through their own fundraising projects, which include sales of refrigerators, microwaves and final exam care packages.

p. “This isn’t money that students have paid in their tuition.” Pilchen said, adding that the money comes from the same fund that has been used to pay for flowers for Sandra Day O’Connor, “Know Your Rights” cards for students and SA pizza parties.

p. There was initially debate in the senate regarding the legality of paying for student voter registration, but senators checked with the Virginia State Board of Elections.

p. “The Code of Virginia does not expressly prohibit compensating individuals [for] working on voter registration drives,” Gary Ellis, voter registration coordinator for the board, wrote in a letter.

p. McClean said that the bill is not only legal and good for students, but good for the community as well.

p. “I think citizens only stand to benefit from students being more active in the community.”

Football: CAA teams have strong

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The CAA fared well in the opening round of the Division 1 FCS playoffs, advancing three teams to the quarterfinals. The Universities of Richmond, Delaware and Massachusetts all registered decisive wins, while the conference’s other two qualifiers, James Madison University and the University of New Hampshire suffered narrow losses. Delaware blew out in-state rival Delaware State 44-7 and UMass and Richmond turned in similarly strong performances, beating Fordham 49-35 and Eastern Kentucky 31-14, respectively. Perhaps the league’s most impressive effort, however, came from James Madison, which took two-time defending National Champion Appalachian State to the wire before succumbing 28-27 on a late touchdown with a minute to play.

Men’s Cross Country: College places 15th at

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The Tribe turned in a strong performance at the NCAA Championships in Terre Haute, Ind., placing 15th overall. Senior Christo Landry headlined the squad, recording an impressive 13th-place finish to earn All-American honors for the third time in his career. Landry’s time of 30:04.0 made him only the third College runner to ever finish in the top 15 in the country. Joining their teammate in the top 150 of the 250-man field were redshirt freshman Patterson Wilhelm (123rd; 31:20.8), senior Dave Mock (133rd; 31:24.5), senior Ian Fitzgerald (138th; 31:25.5) and sophomore Ben Massam (139th; 31:25.5).

Women’s Soccer: Tribe falls to U.Va. in second round of NCAA tournament

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The College defeated Georgetown 2-1 in the opening round of NCAA tournament play in Charlottesville Nov. 18, before falling to the University of Virginia 1-0 on a late goal with 14 seconds remaining, ending their season. In the opener, the Tribe jumped to an early lead when freshman defender Kaitlin O’Connor ripped a 25-yard free kick into the net, before junior forward Claire Zimmeck doubled the tally with a header in the 60th minute. The two scores were enough to see the squad through to the second round after a late Georgetown rally fell short. Two days later against U.Va., playing on its home field, the College dominated play throughout the first half, but was unable to score. They were unable to maintain the pressure in the latter half, allowing the late goal. Junior goalkeeper Meghan Walker totaled 7 saves in the loss.

Spiders steal one from Tribe

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Playing its fourth road game of the season Wednesday, the Tribe (1-4) fell 58-55 to the University of Richmond Spiders (4-4).

p. Trailing 31-26 at halftime, the College started the second half on an 18-5 run to take a 44-36 lead with 10:27 remaining. 12 of the 18 points came from behind the arc during the spurt as the Tribe hit eight of 19 from three-point range for the game. However, the Spiders surpassed the College in three-point proficiency, connecting on 14 of 29 attempts.

p. Richmond’s sophomore guard David Gonzalvez caught fire in the second half, hitting four threes, including three in a row to put the Spiders up 53-50 at the 4:45 mark. Richmond held onto the lead down the stretch behind a short jumper from freshman forward Justin Harper and another three from Gonzalvez, which gave the Spiders a 58-53 lead with 1:46 left.

p. After the teams traded scoreless possessions, junior forward Chris Darnell’s lay-up cut the Tribe’s deficit to three at 58-55 with 0:51 remaining.

p. At the other end of the floor, sophomore guard David Schneider came up with a defensive rebound and fed senior forward Laimis Kisielius, who had his lay-up rejected by Harper and sent out of bounds.

p. The College retained possession with 9.8 seconds left when Darnell inbounded the ball to Kisielius in the lane. Kisielius dribbled out beyond the arc, but could not connect on his three-pointer, and Richmond’s sophomore forward Dan Geriot grabbed the rebound as time expired.

p. “It would have been a great win for us on the road,” Head Coach Tony Shaver said in a postgame interview on the Tribe radio network. “We had it there for the taking.”

p. Kisielius picked up three fouls in the first half and drew his fourth foul early in the second half to limit his playing time to just 16 minutes. Senior guard Nathan Mann paced the Tribe with 13 points on four of six shooting from three-point range as he regained his shooting stroke. Darnell and junior Alex Smith contributed 10 points each.

p. For the Spiders, Gonzalvez led all scorers with 21 and Harper came off the bench to chip in a career-high 13 points to lead Richmond to victory.

p. Prior to Wednesday’s road loss, the College earned its first victory of the season in its home opener Nov. 25 against Houston Baptist University. The Tribe pulled away midway through the second half to defeat Houston Baptist 79-70.

p. Sophomore David Schneider and senior Laimis Kisielius scored 19 points each to lead all scorers, while Darnell and senior Chris Stratton chipped in career-high efforts of 12 and 10 points, respectively.

p. The College travels to Richmond Wednesday to face last year’s CAA Champion Virginia Commonwealth University in each team’s first conference game of the season. Tip-off is scheduled for 7:30 p.m.

Following disappointing year, Tribe looks ahead

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On the heels of a disappointing 4-7 season, Head Coach Jimmye Laycock and the rest of the Tribe have already begun to examine what steps the team must take this offseason.

p. Entering the year with high expectations, the College won four of its first seven games, including an impressive overtime victory over Liberty University. But things took a turn for the worse in the second half of the season, as the Tribe dropped its final four contests, all against ranked foes.

p. Despite the early success, the Tribe suffered through a myriad of inconsistencies as the season progressed. On multiple occasions the College played well against strong opponents, emerging victorious on the road against the University of Maine and at home against Towson University, but the team failed to turn heads with any major upsets.

p. The Tribe came closest to a season-defining victory against the then fourth-ranked University of Massachusetts homecoming weekend, but the game slipped out of the College’s grasp as the Minutemen hung on for a two-touchdown win.

p. “It was very disappointing to not be as successful as we would have liked to be,” Laycock said. “There were a couple games we left like we could have really gotten, and we didn’t. It’s a very difficult league.”

p. The inconsistencies that plagued the Tribe stemmed from the multitude of injuries that the College suffered throughout the season.

p. Due to the depletion of players on both sides of the ball, 14 redshirt or true freshmen saw action in the team’s season-ending game against the University of Richmond. The Tribe turned the ball over four times against the Spiders, in addition to allowing a blocked punt in the contest.

p. “We just had some mistakes there,” Laycock said. “We’ve got a lot of guys out there who are put in situations that are young and haven’t had the experience and haven’t played a whole lot. You look at the type of players we bring in here. We really have to work to develop our players into good players, and sometimes that takes time. I think some of our guys are going to be good players, but I think they need to develop.”

p. The time for development is in the offseason, and the Tribe enters this winter with the majority of the team’s roster intact, as only a handful of players have exhausted their eligibility. However, the team understands that experience and age are not the only factors that impact performance on the field.

p. “It’s more the mental makeup of the team as opposed to the physical part of it,” Laycock said. “It’s how the team comes together, the leadership, the attitudes, those types of things that make your team, more than just how many skill players or how many guys you have returning.

p. “We have the potential to be a better team next year because of guys returning, but it is also going to be determined by how the team comes together and how the team shapes up.”

p. Simply put, leadership is vital. The Tribe’s captains this season, senior offensive lineman Brad Stewart and junior cornerback Derek Cox, led by example off the field and on, as the two were among four members of the College named to the all-CAA third team. Junior quarterback Jake Phillips and junior wideout Elliot Mack also earned all-conference honors.

p. With Stewart departing, the onus will be on Cox, Phillips and the rest of the Tribe’s upperclassmen to instill the hard-work mentality and positive attitude that will be essential to the team’s success next season. Coach Laycock has already begun meeting with players in an effort to get them focused, prepared and situated in their role as leaders moving forward.

p. “They need to start with it now, and that’s why we are meeting now and talking about it as opposed to in the spring,” Laycock said. “Sometimes players kind of get lulled into staying in their same role, and they don’t realize that all of a sudden there’s a different role for them.”

p. The urgency is necessary, as things won’t be getting any easier for the Tribe over the next few seasons. The CAA sent five schools, the most of any conference, to the FCS playoffs, with three of those five advancing to this weekend’s second round.

p. In order for the Tribe to win in the high-pressure CAA, a productive off-season and influential leadership are a must. With weight-room sessions starting in January, the path is laid out, and the College will look to follow it to success.

Lifelong Redskins fan remembers Sean Taylor

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It was almost unbearable for me to watch the Redskins these past two weeks without Sean Taylor on the field, even though I thought he would be back in just a week or so, as soon as his knee healed. I can’t even begin to imagine what it will be like watching this Sunday, knowing that I will never see his number 21 jersey again.

p. As many of you know, 24-year-old Washington Redskins pro bowl safety Sean Taylor died early Tuesday at Jackson Memorial Hospital, less than a day after he was shot in his Miami home. Taylor suffered a severed femoral artery which led to massive blood loss.

p. Like many fans who spent hours searching for news Monday, I went to sleep that night with optimism, thinking that Sean was going to be okay. Reports Monday night told of Taylor responding to a nurse’s request to squeeze her hand and showing facial expressions. However, that hope was short lived, as Tuesday morning fans everywhere awoke to the tragic news of Taylor’s death.

p. Sean Taylor was the fifth overall pick in the 2004 draft out of the University of Miami, where he was an All-American. Taylor, nicknamed “Meast” by his teammates (half man, half beast), had been named as the hardest hitting player in the NFL by Sports Illustrated. He scored a defensive touchdown in Washington’s 2005 playoff victory over Tampa Bay, the team’s lone playoff win in the past eight seasons. In this, his fourth season, Taylor really started to make a name for himself as one of the league’s premier defensive players. Before spraining his knee in week 10, Taylor led the NFL in interceptions.

p. The Redskins defensive unit struggled without him on the field, giving up four passing touchdowns each in weeks 10 and 11. I know that Dallas Cowboys receiver Terrell Owens would never have caught four touchdown passes against the Redskins had Taylor been on the field. Taylor would have almost certainly been a member of this year’s pro bowl team and would have had many pro bowl appearances and playoff victories ahead of him. Instead, Taylor became another young male who tragically lost his life to gun violence.

p. Taylor was mired throughout his career with both on and off-the-field issues. But those close to Taylor, including teammate Clinton Portis and Head Coach Joe Gibbs, noticed his maturation since the birth of his daughter.

p. Sean has been my favorite Redskin since he was a rookie. In fact, he is the reason that the Redskins became more than just a passion for me, and for that I am forever grateful to him. I used to joke with my father that Taylor was the only Redskin for which I had unforgivable love, because while I would get angry with other Redskins players when they made mistakes, my opinion of Taylor never wavered, regardless of his on or off-the-field actions.

p. Far surpassing any of his on-field acheivements, however, is the way Taylor gave up his life defending his girlfriend of seven years, Jackie Garcia, and his 18-month-old daughter. Garcia huddled under the covers of their bed holding their child in her arms as Taylor was shot by the intruders. Actor Andy Garcia, Jackie’s uncle, said the following about Taylor in an article in the Miami Herald:

p. “His heroic action on that tragic night saved their life and is a testament to his humanity and courage. His spirit will live forever, in our hearts and through the legacy of his achievements and the family he leaves behind.’’

p. I will remember Sean Taylor as a true son of Washington, a brave caught on the warpath.

p. __E-mail Andy Andrews at raandrews@wm.edu__

‘Beowulf’ successfully adapts tale

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When Hollywood tackles epic tales, the result isn’t always epic.
Heaven knows Camelot has suffered many a blow. “The Last Legion” and “King Arthur” stand witness. Homer, too, had intellectual property stolen for the worse in “Troy” and “Helen of Troy.”

p. Little wonder, then, that enthusiasts of the Old English epic poem “Beowulf” viewed the preview for Robert Zemeckis’s film adaptation with a mixture of anticipation and wariness.

p. Open-minded “Beowulf” fans, however, will find in this movie a poignant, cleverly written reinterpretation of a timeless tale. Not your mother’s “Beowulf,” Zemeckis presents a fresh portrait of the story that emphasizes the fallibility of the hero.

p. Our generation — having forgone Superman for antiheroes like the Punisher, Danny Ocean’s 11 thieves and others — has cultivated an increasing distrust of heroes. For better or worse, the superhuman warrior Beowulf (Ray Winstone, “The Departed”), a justified braggart in the old tale, would not translate successfully into a modern film.

p. So, clearly we can’t stomach the glory ethos necessary to tell this story straight. If we can’t tell the story of a hero battling actual demons, we can at least show him battling his own.

p. When it comes to the Beowulf legend, deconstruction is the name of the game. Neil Gaiman, author of the award-winning “Sandman” graphic novels, and Canadian screenwriter Roger Avary wrote the movie’s highly imaginative and resourceful screenplay. Surprisingly, they preserve the tale’s plot-points very faithfully. No component is left out — only reinvented.

p. The writers actually pay attention to the minor poetic details that Hollywood usually tramples. All characters are present and mirror their literary counterparts enough to lend them credibility.

p. Even King Hrothgar’s (Anthony Hopkins, “Silence of the Lambs”) allusion to his own dragon-slaying days remains, as does the part in which Unferth (John Malkovich, “Being John Malkovich”) calls Beowulf out for losing in a swimming contest. The pagan-Christian tension, also a part of the poem’s tradition, is deftly woven in as well.

p. Make no mistake — while he would have recognized his creation, the poet would have exclaimed (as he sat in the theater munching early Anglo-Saxon popcorn), “That is not what I meant.”
Gaiman and Avary offer a distorted reflection of the story because the components, though present, have all been tweaked just enough to change the meaning of the entire story.

p. Rather than presenting us with a hero who fights the hopeless fight — all the more glorious, as J.R.R. Tolkien said, because it is futile — we get a hero who succumbs to pride, lies and lust in the most human of ways. As is so often the case with modern deconstructions of tales, the monsters become sympathetic agents of their own destiny and the heroes look like monsters beside them.

p. Possibly the most stunning portion of “Beowulf” is the portrayal of Grendel (Crispin Glover, “Charlie’s Angels”). A parody of man, his cries are human and anguished. This sticks to the ancient story, which describes Grendel as a large humanoid descended from Cain. Damned without a say, poor Grendel represents the consequences of man’s sin.

p. This leads into the biggest departure from the poem: Mother Grendel as a sexy-mama-monster-maker. Those who hated this film hated it mostly because of this angle, ascribing the presence of Angelina Jolie (“Mr. and Mrs. Smith”) to Hollywood’s impulse to sex-up even the most solemn of stories (see “Titanic” and “Pearl Harbor”). However, she comes bearing allegory in addition to eye-candy.

p. Gaiman and Avary set Mother Grendel as the centerpiece — for generations, she has seduced Denmark’s kings and their moral failings beget a monster who returns to plague his father’s kingdom. This proves an interesting and poetic twist, reminiscent of David’s Absalom — the third son of King David who, after fleeing his home, returned leading a rebellion. “The sins of the father” becomes the movie’s mantra. If Hrothgar seems distracted, it’s because Grendel is a beast of his loins. The dragon, in turn, is that of Beowulf’s — the result of Beowulf’s seduction by Mother Grendel.

p. The film succeeds not only through deft manipulation of old material, but in its overall artistry. Once you become accustomed enough to the CGI to realize that this is not a “Shrek” movie, you are transported entirely. The eeriness of Grendel, especially when he and his mother speak pseudo-Old English back and forth, proves very evocative. The feast songs, the individual characters, the gloomy atmosphere and general attention to detail are excellent.

p. Even Beowulf’s unrefined Cockney accent makes sense; he’s a man who lives by muscle and sword and doesn’t learn true heroism until the end.

p. The movie’s theme song, “A Hero Comes Home,” summarizes the movie’s two layers nicely. A hero comes home from the fray, yes. But only once he has undergone life’s trials and learned what matters, can he truly come home to himself.

Coen brothers’ ‘No Country’ surprises, chills

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“No Country for Old Men,” the latest offering from cinematic wonder-twins Ethan and Joel Coen (“O Brother, Where Art Thou?”), seems to have been the victim of some tricky advertising.

p. Trailers would have you believe the film revolves around a “Die Hard”-style everyman turned superman, engaged in a clever cat-and-mouse game with a Tarantino-esque mega-assassin, rife with fist fights, car explosions and shotgun blasts aplenty.
The actual film is a surprisingly different animal.

p. For one thing, the movie is far more subdued, in an eerie sort of way. The whole film is mostly devoid of bright colors, completely devoid of background music and very conservative with human emotions.

p. The characters also aren’t the typical action heroes you’d expect from the previews. Rather, they’re just regular Joes, and the fact that one of them happens to be an insidious serial killer doesn’t change that. He hurts and runs and bleeds just like everybody else, and he certainly does a lot of that last one as he chases a missing $2 million sum from a soured drug deal across the barren plains of the Mojave Desert.

p. Javier Bardem (“Collateral”), in playing serial killer Anton Chigurh, knows how to be a cold, unfeeling badass, and the Coen Brothers, no strangers to the serial killer concept, gave him plenty of room. But unlike your garden-variety cold, unfeeling badass, Chigurh has been deposited in a landscape where everybody else seems to share his bleak outlook on life. Maybe it’s the barren, inhospitable desert backdrop, but everyone in this movie is just trying to get by. Nothing more, nothing less.

p. By the same token, it’s difficult to feel bad for Llewelyn Moss, the finder of the lost cash that Chigurh is after with such vigor. Moss, played with deft gruffness by Josh Brolin (“Grindhouse”), stumbles upon the money after coming across a half-dozen brutally slaughtered men.

p. Perhaps that’s why it’s hard to feel anything for these characters. With the exception of Kelly Macdonald (“Gosford Park”) as Moss’s warm-hearted wife, they’re all leathery faces with leathery personalities — killing, stalking and running without a second thought.

p. The kicker is that it’s not for grand ideals, chivalry or Queen and Country, but for money. Even the guys in “The Italian Job” had the revenge thing going for them. But here, it’s just money, plain and simple. Money in a nondescript black suitcase. Money that only makes anyone and everyone who comes across it thoroughly miserable.

p. Tommy Lee Jones (“Men In Black”) as Sheriff Ed Tom Bell says at the movie’s outset that crime endangers not only the body, but the soul. If that’s true, then that is why this movie feels like such a numbing agent. We’ve seen so much crime, death and violence that one more bloody shoot-up on the big screen just rolls off our collective back like water off the proverbial duck.

p. This movie acts as case-in-point. It elicited more cries of protest from the audience when a dog was shot than from all of the human deaths combined. The violence in “No Country for Old Men” isn’t the glitzy James Bond kind, it’s the cold, inexplicable kind, and that’s why it’s so haunting.

‘Enchanted’ wins with ‘Shrek’-like satire

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A Disney animated film has once again reigned over the box office for the Thanksgiving holiday.

p. The surprising thing is that this time it wasn’t a flashy CGI Pixar spectacle, but rather a heartfelt tale that is much closer to the traditional hand-drawn animated fare of yore.

p. “Enchanted” begins in the animated kingdom of Andalasia, where we meet Giselle (Amy Adams, “Catch Me if You Can”), the newest addition to Disney’s lineup of princesses. In the course of one delightfully sappy musical number entitled “True Love’s Kiss,” Giselle meets handsome Prince Edward (James Marsden, “Hairspray”), declares that he is her one true love and immediately agrees that they should be married.

p. Unfortunately, Edward’s evil stepmother, Queen Narissa, (Susan Sarandon, “Thelma & Louise”), is infuriated by the thought of losing her crown to young Giselle, so she dons the form of a Snow White-esque old hag and pushes the fair maiden down an enchanted well. Through a mystical transformation, Giselle goes from being an animated princess to a real-life fair maiden, and she finds herself lost and confused in the very real world of New York City.

p. As soon as she hits the Big Apple, you realize that Giselle is not your average damsel-in-distress, nor is her new real-world suitor your average Prince Charming. She meets divorce lawyer Robert, played by Patrick Dempsey (“Grey’s Anatomy”), who welcomes the confused young woman into his home. Despite their eventual attraction, Robert is not exactly free to sweep Giselle off her feet. He has a pint-sized little princess of his own — his daughter Morgan (newcomer Rachel Covey) — as well as longtime girlfriend Nancy, played by Broadway favorite Idina Menzel (“Rent”), who’s ready for Robert to commit.

p. The relationships in his life are as messy as his cluttered apartment, which Giselle tidies up in a number called the “Happy Working Song” with the help of New York’s finest: a bevy of rats, pigeons and roaches.

p. While Giselle is learning the ways of the city, Prince Edward journeys to New York in search of his betrothed. He is accompanied by Queen Narissa’s malicious henchman Nathaniel (Timothy Spall, “Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban”), who is determined to get rid of Giselle, as well as a scene-stealing chipmunk named Pip.

p. As Edward and his gang experience mishaps around Manhattan, Giselle is finding herself more and more attracted to Robert. Soon she realizes she must make a choice between the handsome Edward and a different kind of Prince Charming who leads a much more exciting, yet complicated life.

p. Fans of classic Disney films will delight in catching the hidden nods to past favorites, from Giselle channeling Snow White with her animal-summoning yodel, to the inclusion of an Italian restaurant called “Bella Notte,” reminiscent of the beloved spaghetti-eating scene in “Lady and the Tramp.”

p. Also present are the catchy tunes that some of Disney’s more recent films have been missing. Practical Robert may chide Giselle for randomly bursting into song, but we audience members are still delighted by the infectious tunes of Alan Menken who scored “The Little Mermaid” and “Beauty and the Beast.”

p. The type of show-stopping song and dance number that Disney is known for comes midway through the film with “That’s How She Knows,” but this time it is a live-action spectacle in which Jamaican street performers, sanitation workers and Central Park pedestrians accompany the fair Giselle, rather than friendly animated woodland creatures.

p. If the movie has one flaw, it might be the lengthy climax in which the villainous Narissa finally enters the “real world.” This scene falls into the typical Disney drawn-out-final-battle pattern, and is the only part of the film that borders on tired within an otherwise innovative film. This brief bit of unoriginality is easily forgivable because of the delightful end sequence that follows.

p. Of course every Disney film has to have a moral, and the message in “Enchanted” is a refreshing one, indeed. The film never tries to assert that things are always peachy. It acknowledges that real world problems certainly exist. Yet, through Giselle’s eternally sunny disposition, we become convinced that, with a little perseverance, dreams can still come true.

p. The unique thing about “Enchanted” is that it manages to remain a very earnest, touching story, even while subtly poking fun at the type of dreams-come-true fairy tale it is attempting to emulate. It takes what the classic animated Disney features used to do best, and adds a hint of “Shrek”-esque cynicism to make it more consumable for modern audiences, who realize that life doesn’t always end happily ever after.